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DC and National Lampoon's Pledge This!

 
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Paris hot or not?
Hot?
20%
 20%  [ 2 ]
Not?
80%
 80%  [ 8 ]
Total Votes : 10

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Monica Cray



Joined: 02 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 8:18 pm    Post subject: DC and National Lampoon's Pledge This! Reply with quote

Somehow after reading Mr. Cornelius’ remarks Pledge this didn’t really have a fair chance from the get go. It is clear to me that he is completely bias by his prior and well established hatred toward Ms. Hilton. I saw the film and while it is not Citizen Kane. It is a fun 90 minute treat.
Bias opinions aside I think that Paris was convincing as the ruthless leader of a competitive sorority, it is not unlike young impressionable girls in real life to sycophantically attach themselves to a beautiful sorority princess, which is a little to true to life.

“It’s a ten-point-two on the shitter scale!!”
“I wanna show you something, baby, and it rhymes with ‘my renis.’”
“I’m stuck, and the toilet’s eating me!”
“A mission to turn the wannabes into the be-wanteds.”

Are quotes that are sure to be repeated for decades!

Kerri Kenney is wonderful as the crazy overly horny middle aged woman with a scary boob job and a penchant for gang bangs. Geoffrey Arend is her male alter ego, also seeking love from any woman or thing that will have him. His ability to change character in every scene in order to obtain his goal, to get PUNTANG! Simon Rex as Mr. Cornelius made mention was previously a gay porn star is indisputably HOT! Did I forget to mention also an excellent actor!

The many characters are woven together cohesively to form the films plot. Thanks to and not despite the director William Heins. This is a funny film; you shouldn’t let your bias feelings toward Paris affect your opinion on a good solid film. This is a film review forum and not for Paris bashing.
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David Cornelius
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

With all due respect, I think you may be completely batshit insane. Even if you remove Skanks McCunty entirely, you still have a completely vile noncomedy.
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UDM
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 9:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Paris, don't you have better things to do?


UDM
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Arne



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PostPosted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 9:45 pm    Post subject: Bashing Paris is too easy Reply with quote

David Cornelius wrote:
With all due respect, I think you may be completely batshit insane. Even if you remove Skanks McCunty entirely, you still have a completely vile noncomedy.


Dude, bashing Paris is far too easy. The girl just got busted in Australia for dining and ditching.

PLEDGE THIS! is not Shakespeare - it is drink a lot of beer, sit back, look at the chicks, and get a few chuckles in. You all (not counting UDM, nice) spend waaaay too much time thinking this through.
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CharlesTatum



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PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 3:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The woman is famous for no reason whatsoever, and the world will be a better place when her fifteen minutes of infamy are up. How can we help but think this through, when she is thrust into our faces every ten seconds on mainstream television and print media? I did have a sex tape joke here, but honestly, I am sick to death of her.
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Oz
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 4:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ditto. People with acting talent have to wait tables for ten years in the vague hope that they might, one day, get a speaking part in a film and have a shot at a career.

Paris Hilton has all the money she'll ever want, has never worked a day in her disgusting, vile, empathy-free, intelligence vaccuum of a life, and is only famous for going out, getting drunk, and fucking on camera.

And she gets to be in a movie.

I could give a damn whether the film is good, bad or indifferent. It'll never receive a dime from me, nor one moment of my viewing time, and if I ever again have the vile experience of being in the same room as Paris Hilton, jail time be damned, I'm going to walk up and kick her in the junk so hard she'll never show that sagging cooch on film again.
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Kand El
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 4:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Skanks McCunty.

Skanks McCunty.

God it gets better every time you say it. Oh gawd that's a fucking delightful, appropos name.
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SeveredAreolas



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PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 6:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh, c'mon everyone... let's be fair. She gave one of the most memorable performances of my lifetime in the remake of House of Wax. Remember when she was impaled through her head with that iron beam? I started a standing ovation in the theater for that one... who knew she would perform in such an allegorical role?
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TheAngryJew
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 12:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You bitches think you got it bad? I just had to watch the whole of The Simple Life 4: Til Death Do Us Part for DVDTalk.

Review pending....

(AND in the same day, I watched eight whole episodes of fucking Stacked. Ugh.)
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f*r*o*s*t*y
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 6:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Paris should have not gotten a nose job and she should quit wearing those fake ass blue contacts that make her look like she has a lazy eye. Then she should put on some fucking underwear. God knows I've seen her virgina more than I've seen, well, possibly anyone else's on the face of the universe. And I shouldn't have seen the damned thing at ALL, considering I'm not sleeping with her. Then she should stop hanging out with greasy ass Brandon Davis.

Why the hell do I know so much about someone that can't act, can't sing, and can't even put on a pair of gd underwear in the morning?
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Arne



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 4:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

SeveredAreolas wrote:
Oh, c'mon everyone... let's be fair. She gave one of the most memorable performances of my lifetime in the remake of House of Wax. Remember when she was impaled through her head with that iron beam? I started a standing ovation in the theater for that one... who knew she would perform in such an allegorical role?


That's what I'm talking about. When she is given the right role, it is great to watch her.

Maybe next, she could star in a remake of Death Becomes Her
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Oz
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 4:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great. She was fun to watch because she was dying horribly.

Maybe we could sign Nicole Ritchie up for the sequel and light her on fire. She'd win a fucking Oscar.
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SeveredAreolas



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 7:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Arne wrote:

That's what I'm talking about. When she is given the right role, it is great to watch her.

Maybe next, she could star in a remake of Death Becomes Her


Maybe next I could lay the sarcasm on a little thicker.
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MP Bartley
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 8:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing
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Alex Paquin
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 8:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Reminds me of a joke I heard on Royal Canadian Air Farce a while back, Jeopardy-style:

"The answer: Paris Sheraton, Paris Delta, Paris Hilton.
The question: Name two hotels and a slut."

And she looks like a horse.
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CharlesTatum



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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oz wrote:
Great. She was fun to watch because she was dying horribly.

Maybe we could sign Nicole Ritchie up for the sequel and light her on fire. She'd win a fucking Oscar.


Nicole Ritchie on fire would be like watching a birthday candle with its ribcage showing.
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Alex Paquin
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Charles Tatum wrote:
Nicole Ritchie on fire would be like watching a birthday candle with its ribcage showing.


If you and Sommersby ever get to do a comedy show together, could I be your manager? Very Happy
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CharlesTatum



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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alex Paquin wrote:
Charles Tatum wrote:
Nicole Ritchie on fire would be like watching a birthday candle with its ribcage showing.


If you and Sommersby ever get to do a comedy show together, could I be your manager? Very Happy


Who would want to watch two guys sitting around, drinking beer, and goofing on softcore porn together?

Very Happy
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Kand El
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I would love to hear a counterpoint to all this from Monica at this point, particulary to the "Batshit Insane" rebuttal from our lovely film pundit David Tiberius Biggus Diccus Cornelius.
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f*r*o*s*t*y
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 8:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alex Paquin wrote:
Reminds me of a joke I heard on Royal Canadian Air Farce a while back, Jeopardy-style:

"The answer: Paris Sheraton, Paris Delta, Paris Hilton.
The question: Name two hotels and a slut."

And she looks like a horse.


Mm. I think she looks like a Greyhound.
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MP Bartley
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 10:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The asinine, flea ridden, syphilis infested cum receptacle looks like a greyhound fucking a horse.
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SonicXtreme



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PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 10:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

f*r*o*s*t*y wrote:
Alex Paquin wrote:
Reminds me of a joke I heard on Royal Canadian Air Farce a while back, Jeopardy-style:

"The answer: Paris Sheraton, Paris Delta, Paris Hilton.
The question: Name two hotels and a slut."

And she looks like a horse.


Mm. I think she looks like a Greyhound.

She looks like a diseased cow, man.
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SeveredAreolas



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PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 7:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Someone, I forget who, said once that she looked like a grasshopper, and now everytime I see her that sticks in my mind.
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TheAngryJew
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2007 7:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Here's what I think of her.
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Alex Paquin
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 10, 2007 7:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

TheAngryJew wrote:
Here's what I think of her.


Why did you insist on pulling your punches?
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