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It's a Lovely Day in the Neighborhood...

 
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Jack Sommersby
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2004 7:43 pm    Post subject: It's a Lovely Day in the Neighborhood... Reply with quote

Sorry, ladies and gents, but 'ol Jack is on a hiatus.

Last Sunday I was admitted to the emergency room due to an excruciating pain in my ballsack. After hurling all over the floor of the examing room (I didn't feel nauseated until the nurse asked me if I did), I:

-- got doped up on Demerol.
-- recieved a CAT scan.
-- got blood work done.
-- had a sonogram on said ballsack.

Diagnosis: kidney stone and urinary tract infection!

Luckily, I had the moola to pay for the prescriptions (generic, of course), but I'm dreading the damn hospital bill, that's for sure. Anyway, writing is one of the last things on my list of priorities right now, so ya'll will have to continue to suffer without my brilliant usage of words for a while longer, otay?

Wink
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Last edited by Jack Sommersby on Sat Feb 07, 2004 8:48 pm; edited 1 time in total
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SpasticLemur
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2004 7:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Damn man! I havn't had kidney stones, but I have had gallstones, and those suckers hurt like hell as well. I used to live on demerol and morphine while a doctor treated me for stomach ulcers, until one night at the ER another doctor figured it out in 30 seconds and we got that problem solved, trouble is, that took 6 months of ER visits. Darn glad my insurance covered all that.

Take care man, get better and get back here soon.

Lemur
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TheAngryJew
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2004 7:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ugh, that fucking sucks! Feel better quickly, Jacko.

I sincerely shudder to think of if this happened to me, as I've no insurance whatsoever. (And next to no dinero.)
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Alex Paquin
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 07, 2004 10:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Take care Jack.

I have read somewhere that the United States is the only industrialized country without some formed of socialized medical system.

I can imagine the usual argument: "Well, if we do that we might as well surrender the whole country to Castro. We don't want no Communistic takeover of America. Goddamned pinkos. So if anyone dies because they can't afford to go to the hospital, they're really being patriotic. God Bless America (well, He'd better if He doesn't want us to invade heaven)."

Every time some US politician talks about doing that, he immediately gets the "Commie" label and forgets he ever had balls. And that's for the sincere ones.
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Big Ole Badass Bob



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PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2004 1:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jack - Son, you hurry up and get well. When you're up to it, ole Bob is gonna take you on a fishing trip. Smile I tell ya, nothing makes you feel better then when you're out fishing, drinking a case or 12 of Hooch, and tossing an Oriental or two over the side of the boat, then watching the Tiger Sharks eat them kooky sons-o-bitches as they scream in their foreign tongues. Razz Ah, I miss the Gulf of México already. Good times I yell ya, good times. Anyway, get better.. cause this place won't be the same without you, ya silly bastard. Rolling Eyes

Uh-oh.. Bob's eyes are tearing up. Crying or Very sad Damn it.. I hate it when this happens. Now I gotta go toss a whore or five into the alligator filled moat.. that way I feel better about letting you all see the warm-hearted side of the Bobster™. Twisted Evil
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Maegs
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PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2004 12:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Alex Paquin wrote:
Take care Jack.

I have read somewhere that the United States is the only industrialized country without some formed of socialized medical system.
.



True. Even South Africa has a medical system. There's nothing that arouses my ire like the state of the US's medical system. (I'm a political cat by nature.) Everytime I hear one of the no insurance horror stories I threaten a move to Canada. What good is it having great health care if only certain people can afford it? People keep wondering why drugs are so much cheaper in Canada. Its not a coincidence people! Its what happens when your government presents a united front in behalf of its citizens to the pharmaceutical industry.

The new Medicare bill forbids our government from negotiating for better prices from the drug companies. That's right--makes it ILLEGAL to present a united front for your behalf. What a gift for an industry that makes you watch their commercials and then charges you for the priveledge.

Ok, rant done.

Hope you're feeling better soon.

-M
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Oz
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2004 12:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'd join in on this with my usual anti-US government stance, but you guys make all the valid points that should be made.

Go thinkers! Razz
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Charles Tatum



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2004 10:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Remember, Jack, vigorous lotioned massage of your naughty bits should clear that right up!
Embarassed
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y2mckay
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2004 12:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Told you all that wanking was bad for ya Very Happy

Seriously, though, I've had a UTI once before and those are a bitch - unless you like pissing fire, of course. Just thank God it wasn't the clap (I know I did).
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Big Ole Badass Bob



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2004 4:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

y2mckay - Son, you were pissing fire, cause that was God's way of telling you that bangin' Oriental bitches is a sin. Razz He only wants you to stick your plump poker into dirty Mexican broads. Rolling Eyes I could be wrong though, but I doubt it.. I'm an expert on this subject. Twisted Evil
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Jack Sommersby
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 14, 2004 10:52 am    Post subject: ---------- Reply with quote

Thanks for the warm wishes, you all -- except you, Oz (not one word of sympathy for my aching ballsack, you fuck!? Confused ).

Due to doctor's orders, I consumed no alcohol or caffeine in almost 2 frigging weeks. Last night was the first time I'd even had a lousy beer during this time, and I only drank about half of it. Loads of carbonated drinks and not urinating as much as I should have during my work hours as a courier did this to me, and I now carry a jug in the car so I can pull off the side of the road whenever I even get a slight inkling of the need to pee. As for the kidney stone, I don't know if I passed it yet or what. I do know that I'm drinking tons of water every day now and staying away from Cokes and the like (which is very hard to get used to).

Oh, and Booty-Obsessed Bob, if I contract anything from any of your damn Mexican whores on our fishing expedition (can I use a toe-the-line Bushie for bait instead of an Oriental? Very Happy ), you're going to be paying the medical costs! Laughing

(By the way, if any of you ever contracts VD and needs treatment at a reasonable price, consider the fine folks at Planned Parenthood. I went there last year with limited funds, and they fixed me up for only $50 -- and that was including medication. If I ever win the Texas Lotto, I'll personally donate $1 million to PP. As opposed to Bush's jerk-off abstinence-favored groups, PP actually makes a difference in sex-related prevention and treatment.)
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Charles Tatum



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PostPosted: Sat Feb 14, 2004 1:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Damn, Jack, you got problems all over! I hope you get back to normal soon.
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Big Ole Badass Bob



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PostPosted: Sun Feb 15, 2004 7:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jack - Son, the only thing you're gonna get from my whores is worn out meat rod. Very Happy Them bitches really know how to wear ya out, trust me on this one. And hey, you use whatever you want for bait.. Bob don't care. Razz All I know, is that we're gonna be too drunk to remember how a body or two got stuck into the trunk of my car, and why my wooden leg is jammed up one of their dead Poop Palaces. Confused Oh well.. we'll worry about that later, right? Rolling Eyes
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Jack Sommersby
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 20, 2004 9:19 am    Post subject: ----------- Reply with quote

Well, it appears the emergency-room bill has topped the $7,000 mark!

The initital bill I got was for $6,810.25 for a three-hour stay. But yesterday there was another bill awaiting me from a radiologist's private practive who I guess did work on me while I was doped up. So add in another....

(drum roll)

....$525 on top of that!

As for now (and who knows what other related bills might come in), the grand total is only...

...$7,335.25

Hoo-ah!

(On a side note, I was extremely upset at work yesterday in light of a book being put in my mailbox that listed all of the doctors in the company's health-plan network, when, uh, I don't have any medical insurance because the company hasn't offered me any, because I'm only a part-time worker who can't get full-time hours. I told my boss that with a huge hospital bill looming over me because I'm not insured, that this was like spitting in my face. I gave her the book back and said I don't want to see one until I'm insured, thank you.)
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Jack Sommersby
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2004 9:00 am    Post subject: ------- Reply with quote

...and there was another seperate bill awaiting my arrival on Friday evening from another doctor for the emergency-room visit.

So add on another $215!

Total as of now:

$7,550.25

Mad
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