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Overall Rating

Worth A Look: 14.77%
Average: 9.09%
Pretty Bad: 19.32%
Total Crap28.41%

6 reviews, 52 user ratings

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Idle Hands
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by Erik Childress

"Pot Reduces Screenwriter's Brain Cells"
2 stars

Idle Hands (* Ĺ) - Taking a ten-minute premise and stretching it into a feature-length 90 is not an easy task. The ten-minute premise Iím referring to is in the film Evil Dead 2 which has a classic sequence where Bruce Campbellís hand becomes possessed by evil and drags him all around the house. Itís not the first killer hand scene but probably the best. Now comes Idle Hands which seems to take its inspiration from that scene in Evil Dead 2 that it begins to feel like a Saturday Night Live feature film.

This film has been talked about a daily basis for the last three weeks on the Jonathon Brandmeier show - mainly because Johnny has been fascinated for years with a real-life condition known as the ďAlien Hand SyndromeĒ where a personís hand literally becomes alive and starts attacking its owner. Johnny even tried to get a real-life victim of this affliction who was interviewed on Dateline NBC to come to the premiere with no success. A dark comedy about someone with an alien hand could have been something really funny, but instead we get a Roger Corman-graduate directing an idiotic script with no real imagination to it. The film also canít decide if itís a horror movie or a comic horror film. Itís shifts in tone are too radical for even the savviest critic to decide. The only things I enjoyed in the film on any basis were the deceased Beavis-and-Butthead routine of Elden Henson and the always amusing Seth Green - and the scene where Mr. Alien Hand is forced to grapple with his dream girl during their moment of passion. Other than that, thereís not much to see other than gross-out effects and extensive marijuana use. I was amazed at how much pot was in this movie. It made the Cheech and Chong movies look like a Nancy Reagan telethon. And in an insulting moment in the script - pot is what saves the day - literally. The characters are such losers that itís impossible to sympathize with them unless youíre someone that likes staring at frisbees all day long. The film never explains how Anton doesnít realize heís the killer early on. Was he so doped up that he didnít realize his hand was killing his parents? Thatís piss-pore manipulation on the part of the screenwriters to pull some intended nifty twists out of their ass and it doesnít work. And the girlfriend played by the next teen mag cover girl Jessica Alba is such a horndog doorknob that when Handboy, who has lived across the street from her all her life, has never said two words to her, shows up at her door, frazzled and with blood stains all over his shirt, she never bothers to care. Because he returned her precious songbook to her, sheís ready to jump his bone and ask no questions later. I could not believe how dumb this character was and why my neighborhood girls arenít like that? The film is also bad on a technical level too because the corpse makeup becomes increasingly less apparent. Unlike An American Werewolf in London with its rotting undead corpses, death actually seems to agree with the two dead friends because the makeup becomes less and less, especially on Seth Green. Since no one bothers to mention this in the movie, itís a standout flaw in filmmaking. So much could have at least been attempted with this premise. I wanted to see a movie about an Alien Hand, but it gets chopped off halfway through and then wanders along like Thing from The Addams Family which had much more personality than this entity.

If youíre going for lowbrow humor why not go all out and have the Alien Hand literally give the guy a ďjobĒ or something. It certainly would have been funnier than anything Iím sure was down on the written page. Quality kills are abound including a particularly funny (to me) one where the band leader gets scalped by the hand. My fellow movielover on the radio, Buzz Kilman, may be happy but Johnny would certainly be disappointed. (Sidenote: We canít put our lives on hold because a few psychopaths blow away their fellow students. Stop blaming the movies, Senator Liebermann, who called for a ban on Idle Hands of all films. You donít care - this is just a political platform for you - so go to hell. Since people get all Viagranized over statistics in this country - chew on this one - For every two psychopaths who gun down some people, there are millions of others who watched the same movies, played the same video games, and saw the same TV shows. They didnít kill anyone. Maybe because they donít own guns. Maybe because theyíre not sick in the head.)

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originally posted: 02/16/00 08:12:17
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User Comments

9/14/17 morris campbell minor but fun 3 stars
8/16/11 Machine Gun Tom My hands weren't "IDLE" when jessica Alba's hot body appeared on screen. 5 stars
11/26/08 Shaun Wallner Seth Green is Hilarious! 5 stars
4/08/07 fools♫gold Plays with .".ignorance.". 2 stars
3/20/07 matthew totally idiotic but entertainingly gory, tit-filled, stoner comedy 5 stars
1/28/07 Jeff Anderson As dumb teen horror-comedies go, its actually funny. Green & Henson have the best moments!! 4 stars
8/15/06 Anastasia Beaverhausen Doesn't make much sense, but still your mom 3 stars
9/15/05 Gray dumb fun 5 stars
2/06/05 clinger26 couldn't stop laughing 5 stars
12/23/04 Jason Kaul You don't even get to see fine assed Jessica Alba's tits. Really really bad flick. 2 stars
10/04/04 Josh Standlee Devon Sawa is one hell of an actor, and Jessica Alba is very hot! Buy it now! 5 stars
8/06/04 Anthony G If I ever see jessica albe, im gonna give her P.C.P. then fuck her in the eye 1 stars
7/28/04 Mike Devans BORING 1 stars
7/24/04 Phoenix II I wanna ram my huge cock in and out of Jessica Alba's ass. 3 stars
12/13/03 latch pen really funny it kicks ass 5 stars
9/18/03 Samuel Justus Pretty funny! 3 stars
9/15/03 Collin Stupid, Mindless, Ascinine, Pointless, Mindless, Poorly Concieved Garbage with no style 1 stars
1/09/03 dopplegangers it is great and sexy 5 stars
12/15/02 me i would fuck her so hard.... 4 stars
4/30/02 Phoenix Mediocore at best, but man I want to put my cock up Jessica Alba's ass. 3 stars
4/16/02 daniel ending rubbish 5 stars
3/20/02 Jay I couldn't help but jerk off looking at jessica,God I wish I could fuck and suck her tits 3 stars
3/02/02 Alan Smithee I enjoyed it. Seth Green was hilarious, and Jessica Alba was very sexy. 4 stars
1/24/02 Shane Robert Myers!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Funny, sick, eroitic & twisted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
1/12/02 rb one of my favorites 5 stars
9/26/01 Eric Jordan I want to put my cock up her ass 3 stars
9/06/01 Jim Amusing nonsense 4 stars
6/16/01 The Man Dude, Jessica Alba's ass MADE the movie, that one scene made it a great movie. 5 stars
4/09/01 Gary This is a very funny movie. It's a dark comedy. Great Sawa flick. 4 stars
3/02/01 Seth Green Has no semblance of coherent filmmaking, but damn I wanna fuck Jessica Alba's tight lil ass 5 stars
2/18/01 Flora A post-modern horror laugh-fest, just don't take it too seriously... 4 stars
1/28/01 Harvey If for nothing else, see this film for deliciously dark angel alba, in short shorts no less 4 stars
1/27/01 Soggy Bottom Boy Pleasantly suprised; listen to DVD commentary, a lot of good behind-the-scenes stuff there. 4 stars
6/07/00 Bender Pretty good, and amusing Horror-Comedy 4 stars
3/20/00 Steve Layne Campy, funny and very bloody! 4 stars
2/09/00 MarshyMan Violence for violence sake. Crap story, crap acting. 2 stars
2/06/00 Kyle Broflovski "So if you don't rate, just overcompensate...the world needs wanna-bes..." etc 1 stars
1/11/00 Suzanne Briscoe A waste of time. 1 stars
12/13/99 Tyson Stewart some good parts, but all around the film is stupid! 2 stars
12/11/99 Jack Donovan I went in for Seth Green and was suprised as all hell that I actually got my money's worth. 5 stars
10/19/99 Alexander damn funny and pretty scare. I love Alba... alot 5 stars
9/18/99 Buford "Mad Dog" Tannen Hilarious; great sets; Green, Sawa, and Hensen rule, & an unbelievably fine Jessica Alba 5 stars
6/28/99 Stephen Bashakus Devon, Seth, and Elden show talent, but the movie is an exercise in creative diarreha. 2 stars
6/26/99 David It's really funny, reminds me of "The Frighteners" in many positive ways 4 stars
5/10/99 Diptherio This movie needs bruce campbell to make it work 1 stars
5/10/99 Ah Dooey Great... and I hate horror movies! 5 stars
5/02/99 Eddie okay funny,but a kid kills people? Bad message! 3 stars
5/02/99 CYaniDERuSH most of the gags where derived from evil dead2, but it was still a piss 5 stars
4/29/99 The Graduate Dumb premise, nice execution. Some genuinely funny moments. 4 stars
4/03/99 the DUDE I was so funny-And gross at the same time 5 stars
1/25/99 Dark Horizons Idle Hands isn't a great film, but it's very fun to say the least. 4 stars
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  30-Apr-1999 (R)


  09-Dec-1999 (MA)

Directed by
  Rodman Flender

Written by
  Terri Hughes
  Ron Milbauer

  Devon Sawa
  Seth Green
  Elden Henson
  Fred Willard
  Connie Ray

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