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Overall Rating
3.28

Awesome28.48%
Worth A Look: 25.95%
Average: 10.76%
Pretty Bad: 14.56%
Total Crap: 20.25%

14 reviews, 74 user ratings


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Snakes on a Plane
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by Rob Gonsalves

"Just see the motherfuckin' movie, motherfucker."
5 stars

In case you wondered, it comes about an hour and twenty minutes in: the call and response in the Church of B-Movies, with Samuel L. Jackson as the hellfire pastor. "Enough is enough!" bellows Jackson. "I have had it with these motherfuckin' SNAKES on this motherfuckin' PLANE!" The heavily sarcastic audience at the Thursday-night screening went wild. The entire movie leads up to that line, that delivery of that line, that actor delivering that line in that way.

Is it worth the wait? As someone with a deep appreciation for B-movies done with panache, I'd say yes. Snakes on a Plane delivers the goods. How could it not? It does drag a bit in the middle; there are, as it happens, only so many ways you can do snakes on a plane, and the filmmakers' ingenuity peaks early. Still, this is perfectly pleasurable drive-in fare, and would have been even without the incessant Internet hype that we're all a little tired of by now. What's going to be funny is watching Hollywood try to catch this schlock-zeitgeist lightning in a bottle twice. But they can't. Snakes on a Plane will be often imitated, never duplicated.

I mourn the loss of original director Ronny Yu, who might've made his Snakes as a "crazy mad Hong Kong version," to quote Jackson. But Final Destination 2 helmer David R. Ellis steps up authoritatively and gets the dirty job done. Jackson's FBI agent Neville Flynn must protect a murder witness (Nathan Phillips) from the vicious ganglord whose baseball-bat antics he inadvertently eavesdropped on. Flynn puts the guy on a red-eye from Honolulu to L.A. to testify. The ganglord arranges to have a wide variety of poisonous snakes (from all over the world, we're told by snake expert Todd Louiso) placed in the cargo hold, with pheromones making them super-aggressive. At a certain point, the snakes dangle down into the coach cabin along with the oxygen masks, and it's showtime.

Snakes on a Plane was famously reshot to upgrade it from a milder PG-13 to a harder R rating, and the additional sleaze (snake vs. boob) and gore certainly don't hurt. Watching it with a snarky crowd amped up for self-aware crapola is a meta experience — every death becomes a home run, every bit of foreshadowing ("Yes, coach is safe," stewardess Julianna Margulies reassures a nervous chihuahua-carting bimbo) an occasion for MST3K-style goofing. This is absolutely one of the great audience films, if you see it with the right jaded mix of people (or just go with a large group of like-minded friends). I really don't see it working as well in your living room (unless, again, you invite a bunch of derisive geeks over).

Jackson does his usual Jackson thing; he knows he's there to come across with the Samuel L. Jackson-ness, and he pleases the crowd without too much effort. To be honest, it was more fun watching him gleefully promoting the film on The Daily Show than watching him in the actual movie; Snakes on a Plane doesn't quite live up to the Great Ultimate Samuel L. Jackson Motherfuckin' Movie in your head. But it'll do, and there's fun support from Kenan Thompson as the videogame-addicted Troy, Bobby Cannavale as an FBI desk jockey who finds himself collaring a snake wrangler in the desert when he'd rather be bidding on a black velvet Pam Anderson painting, and David Koechner as the unflappable co-pilot who manages to steer the plane with a Popeye-swollen arm full of venom.

"Snakes on a Plane" is a catchphrase, a marketing triumph, a hipster phenomenon. Fortunately, it's also a slyly entertaining flick divorced from all that, with various satisfying snake kills (many will enjoy the fate of the poor sap who only sought to empty his bladder; others will thrill to the unfair match of insufferable British twit vs. boa constrictor). Best of all, it can't possibly disappoint your expectations, because what are you expecting? There's a plane. There are snakes on it. And there's Samuel L. Jackson. For once, you get exactly what the ads promise.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=15043&reviewer=416
originally posted: 08/18/06 14:43:42
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User Comments

7/10/11 Dr.Lao FIlm makers showing their honest contempt for their audience 1 stars
7/10/11 Jennifer Barr alright, although it just seemed so predictible thru out 3 stars
12/26/10 Blue Shark Dude ... The people who don't get it are Republicans anyway ... so no loss. 5 stars
6/01/10 User Name Snakes On A Plane aims low, and hits lower. 2 stars
10/25/09 Miss Snake The best fun a movie could offer. The fake looking CGI snakes are hysterically funny. 4 stars
7/25/09 Jeff Wilder Works better if you view it as a comedy rather than as a thriller. 3 stars
11/20/08 PAUL SHORTT EVEN IF VIEWED ENTIRELY ON ITS OWN TERMS, THIS FILM, LIKE ANY SNAKE, TAPERS AT ITS END 2 stars
3/07/08 SamanthaPayntr it definitely delivered, there were snakes and they were on a plane, pretty good stuff 3 stars
7/27/07 TreeTiger A piece of cinematic shit - I recommend... Anything BUT this... 1 stars
7/11/07 Tiffany Losco I thought it was ok, but I didn't like the blonde bimbo in the bathroom 2 stars
4/02/07 CAB I was expecting Leslie Nielsen to show up at any minute… 2 stars
3/29/07 Your mom Assholes, this movie is the worst shit ever.STUPID. ASS. HOLES. 1 stars
2/27/07 Asian God 94 The BEST B-grade horror movie of all time! Compulsary Viewing 5 stars
2/19/07 JM Synth No where near as fun, or silly, as it should have been 3 stars
2/14/07 Prada it was sooo.. bad it was actually good 3 stars
2/05/07 MickT Samuel L. Jackson is the biggest sell-out EVER!! what a piece of shit this film is!!! 1 stars
2/03/07 Indrid Cold Upside: it's as exciting as a snakes/planes movie could possibly be. Downside: ditto. 3 stars
2/02/07 Anthony Feor People expect us to take this movie seriously? 0.5/5 1 stars
1/22/07 Matt It should be clasified as COMEDY 5 stars
1/19/07 Jeff Brown pitiful 1 stars
1/14/07 Sugarfoot It felt like an Airport sequel. Overall not as fun as I thought it would be. 2 stars
1/09/07 Matt Get a life, have a laugh - this is FUN,FUN,FUN! 4 stars
12/10/06 JoKimiKo the movie is AwsOme but ur REviEw! is craP 1 stars
11/18/06 Lerker You are the worst reveiwer. Ever. 1 stars
11/17/06 Nick So, you gave Borat 1 Star, but SOAP 5 Stars? I do not comprehend your thought process. 3 stars
11/11/06 Serge Piece of crap IMO. Snakes on crack...har har. 2 stars
10/28/06 DIANA a movie to watch on tv if nothing else to watch 2 stars
10/25/06 Drew G So bad it was good... 3 stars
10/13/06 Erin Get out of the mud u sticks, it was great fun!!! 4 stars
10/09/06 Mike Nothing great to me. Something to watch if really bored. 2 stars
9/30/06 NiCk Great movie! Was Pulp Fiction good because of its plot? 5 stars
9/21/06 malcolm awful, but a lot of damn fun 3 stars
9/13/06 Edward Connell A purposefull movie that will lead you on an adventure in excitement and possibility. 4 stars
9/12/06 Louise Good fun and a pretty tense ride!!! 4 stars
9/12/06 Michael Coovert Samuel Jackson's stock just plumeted in my book!! Total schtick and effects fodder!!! 1 stars
9/12/06 Kevin Ramsay "Snakes On A Plane" is pure fun. Don't take it too seriously, though. 5 stars
9/11/06 Aaron This move was a blast! 4 stars
9/03/06 Christopher Stucky The hype WAS the story. The movie was an afterthought. 1 stars
9/02/06 Stubby If you all were any stupider, you'd have to be told when to breathe. Kill yourselves. 1 stars
8/31/06 Christine it was soooooo awesome I want to see it over and over again 5 stars
8/28/06 Serina Boccello COME ON!! who honestly wants to see THIS movie!! SNAKES AGGHHH!!! 2 stars
8/28/06 Grant Funny, well acted, stupid jokes, scenes and endless funny deaths. 5 stars
8/27/06 Alan Snakes on a Plane happens 5 stars
8/26/06 Mike D Only movie I've seen in this year that got a standing ovation from the entire theater! 5 stars
8/26/06 michael average and wait for the DVD 4 stars
8/26/06 Stanley Thai Still an average thriller without the famous title. Nothing special. 3 stars
8/26/06 Alex Thorne does exactly what it says on the tin. gruesomly marvellous 4 stars
8/25/06 Robert Blanton Mr. Souter nailed this snake right on the head! 2 stars
8/25/06 Zaw Snakes bites.. lol 5 stars
8/24/06 philip Corcos corcos 5 stars
8/23/06 Centipedes "Snakes? On MY plane?" It's more likely than you think. 5 stars
8/23/06 Quigley much more violent than I thought; sex scene pointless; but Sam Jackson and the snakes rock 4 stars
8/22/06 A. Shah The best time I've had in a movie since I was a kid. I'm now 33. 5 stars
8/22/06 Pn. 1000 fanboys collaborated on the script. That it's schwag should surpise no one. 2 stars
8/22/06 danthewrestlingman Snakes On A Motherfuckin Plane Beeoch Nuff Said 5 stars
8/22/06 Ole Man Bourbon Not enough snakes. JIMMIE BELLE TURN OFF YOUR GODDAMN CAPS LOCK. 3 stars
8/22/06 JIMMIE BELLE REALISM. CAN THIS SCENE REALLY TAKE PLACE? WILL EVERYONE ON THE PLANE BEHAVE LIKE THIS? 5 stars
8/22/06 Sammy J. This movie is the most balla shit eva! 5 stars
8/22/06 Harold You are all tools. 1 stars
8/21/06 Captain Highcrime Not since the glory days of "Married...with Children" have audiences been so boisterous. 5 stars
8/21/06 Jeff Martin Awesome movie, great fun and entertainment, brianorndorf is full of crap in his review 5 stars
8/20/06 ajay go in a packed theatre of nerds who "get it". Otherwise, it's horrible. 4 stars
8/20/06 ray best time i've had at the movies in years. great cinema? maybe not. still fun. 5 stars
8/19/06 Alex S AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME 5 stars
8/19/06 Nads Snakes on a muthafuckin' PLANE! 5 stars
8/19/06 KingNeutron Decent; some really scary parts. Take S.O. to see it. 4 stars
8/19/06 Jesus WAAAY better than expected... ridiculous, stupid, and amazing! 1 stars
8/19/06 Keith This movie was boring. What is up with Snakes on a plane who cares. A total waste of money. 1 stars
8/19/06 Kent Battersby Best. Movie. Ever...SNAKE VISION!!! 5 stars
8/19/06 Adrian It's fun. It's that simple. No thinking, no shit liek that, just fun. 5 stars
8/18/06 Joe Baldwin The audience makes all the difference. Laughter and applause filled the room for 2 hours. 5 stars
8/18/06 Andrew The most fun I've had in a theatre... EVER. 5 stars
8/18/06 Doug Higley Absolute BEST B Horror Ever. Total Fun at breakneck pacing. 5 stars
8/18/06 Squibner Welch Fantastic fun 5 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  18-Aug-2006 (R)
  DVD: 02-Jan-2007

UK
  18-Aug-2006

Australia
  24-Aug-2006




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