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Overall Rating
3.11

Awesome: 12.77%
Worth A Look27.66%
Average: 26.6%
Pretty Bad: 23.4%
Total Crap: 9.57%

3 reviews, 76 user ratings


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Waterworld
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by Chris Parry

"Not nearly as crap as everyone said... but still basically crap."
2 stars

Kev Costner's much laughed at 'epic on the water' was just one of those disasters that everyone wanted to happen. Like Speed 2 and Kevvy's later apocalyptic hack-job The Postman, nobody wanted Waterworld to make a profit, if for no other reason than to teach a few goofy execs a lesson. It sucked and nobody went to see it... but it still made money. Trust me. It did.

...and it didn't cost nearly as much as the hype machine said it did.

But I digress. Waterworld is all about a post-apocalyptic world where the icecaps have melted and land is flooded over. Fresh water is non-existant and treated more preciously than gold.

Big Kev lives on a boat. Cool boat. Kev pees in a bottle and it comes out water. Cool bottle. Kev has a plant. It makes fruit. The fruit isn't cool. It's just fruit.

Kev stops in at a big old island type thing that makes water and tries to defend itself against the decidedly Mad Max style bad guys by swinging on ropes with a knife in his teeth. Kev gets himself caught in the middle of the ensuing battle and almost drowns in poo. In saving himself he ends up stuck with a dorky woman and a little kid who's supposedly can get to "the promised land".

Kev doesn't want her using his crayons. Dennis Hopper has one eye. Jeanne Tripplehorn gets naked. Kev swings on ropes a lot and blows some big sets up.

Is it good? Feh. It's watchable. Certainly not as gosh darn stupid as The Postman, but not nearly as fun as Field Of Dreams. Costner shows his entire acting range, which basically amounts to squinting and sailing. He did the same thing in Message In A Bottle, except slower.

It's certainly worth a rental, on a slow Saturday afternoon when there's nothing on TV but Elvis movies and Tractor Pulls. On the Post-Apocalyptic Costner scale, Waterworld gets a rating of two bombs. And it's lucky to get that many.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=1530&reviewer=1
originally posted: 05/18/99 03:28:05
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User Comments

10/03/10 joszell ..i've watched it yesterday.. its good. awesome productions and effects.. nice.. 4 stars
3/21/10 PAUL SHORTT ENTERTAINING ACTION FILM, WITH GOOD ACTION SCENES, STUNTS AND SET-PIECES 3 stars
1/16/10 Jurij Fedorov My favorite film ever. 5 stars
8/28/09 Jeff Wilder $170 million and none of it was spent hiring a decent screenwriter. 2 stars
11/17/08 Farnsy Not crap but not impressive 3 stars
10/24/08 Farnsy Not as bad as the critics say. 4 stars
10/22/08 Shaun Wallner Well made. 4 stars
9/29/08 gailly_2619 I like the movie so much,it is entertaining and the characters are great>>>>>>>> 5 stars
4/25/08 Karrie Millheim I liked this movie alot, the special effects were good, I have seen it over 25 times 5 stars
3/06/07 David Pollastrini a bit long but very underrated 4 stars
8/20/06 Sepi53 I liked this one, don't understand why critics hate it? 5 stars
7/14/06 David Cohen Science fiction without the science, when will Kevin Costner learn that he is second rate? 2 stars
4/06/06 Indrid Cold Unique and entertaining. Critics prejudged it based on the budget thing. 4 stars
12/22/05 Wiseman This movie was GREAT! I dont know what everyones talking about, 5 stars so much fun to see 5 stars
10/07/05 Klondo way too hated. many scenes have great action and it's one of Costner's best performances. 4 stars
9/13/05 Total Crap Trash. 1 stars
9/02/05 ES Wasn't bad, a little confusing here and there, but also has some fun and coolness to it 3 stars
8/04/05 woody exstra 5 stars
7/26/05 Tummi Super movie, one of my favourits www.tmajorino.kom.pl 5 stars
6/19/05 boo-yaa kid fuckin a 5 stars
6/18/05 Indrid Cold Not even close to a disaster like everyone says. Actually a pretty good action/adventure. 4 stars
5/10/05 susee hey..wasnt a bad attempt after all 4 stars
2/03/05 Aaron Smith Not great, but ok sci-fi 3 stars
1/23/05 keithers.. underrated...i had fun...Coster is great... 3 stars
10/23/04 ODH This money cost how much to make? Where did it all go... 2 stars
8/15/04 jen it is good 3 stars
6/05/04 alien assassin The worst Sci-fi epic ever made (apart from "Battlefield Earth") !!! 1 stars
5/17/04 Dr. Lecter Surprisingly watchable garbage 3 stars
4/04/04 em complete and utter shit 1 stars
4/01/04 jaye its alright if you dont look to closely at what is going on. 3 stars
3/18/04 R.W. Welch A better title would have been "Waterloo." 2 stars
2/25/04 Thomas Not bad. Just that most reviewers fail to understand the concept of science FICTION. 4 stars
2/09/04 Whatevr Slightly overrated 3 stars
1/07/04 Pinkline Jones Best film since Gandhi 5 stars
11/29/03 john some impressive action sequences - good concept but lousy story and terrible ending 3 stars
5/12/03 Jack Bourbon A financial flop, but that's not our problem. Entertaining flick. 4 stars
4/19/03 Ubu the Ripper Whoever paid for this turd should be given a lobotomy without anethesia. 1 stars
4/13/03 Dave A $200+ production cost and we get THIS??? 2 stars
3/19/03 Jack Sommersby Acceptably delivered. But it's too familiar and overlong. 2 stars
12/22/02 Pigwidgeon The most underrated movie of the last three decades. 5 stars
10/26/02 Tar Mac What is it with Kevin Costner and his three hour epics? Does he jerk off watching them? 2 stars
10/22/02 Charles Tatum Believe me, worst has been done 4 stars
7/12/02 KMG KEVIN: PACK YOUR BAGS 2 stars
4/27/02 maximal01 I wanna know... where the hell did all the Smoker's cigs come from??yeah, this film blows.. 2 stars
3/20/02 Steve Mackey Superb action, photography, good humor, little Tina is great. 4 stars
3/17/02 FlaFan The movie and Costner are underrated. Neither deserved the media bashing they got. 4 stars
1/02/02 Andrew Carden It Can Be Good If You Can Overlook It's Dull and Meaningless Script. 4 stars
12/04/01 Shams Huque The show at Universal Studios in LA was far superior! 3 stars
12/02/01 The $1.98 Pyramid The only cool thing is the SFX Universal trademark. 3 stars
10/18/01 officer412/l a major guilty plesure of mine. I know it's dumb,just dont take it seriously 4 stars
9/23/01 Larry Smith Can society degenerate that far? 3 stars
9/06/01 spaceworm At last! Costner finds a film worthy of his talents... 2 stars
8/10/01 R.W. Welch Mad Max at sea. Unconvincing and barely watchable. 2 stars
7/30/01 Henry Ginsberg Good idea .Abit baoring . 3 stars
7/29/01 Jennifer Gaissert Tripplehorn stunk, kid's wig distracted, otherwise OK 3 stars
7/28/01 Henry Ginsberg disapointing 3 stars
7/15/01 Nazi dad Great chase scenes and Dennis Hopper is unforgettable as the despicable "Deacon of D's". 5 stars
6/20/01 Shawna I agree... someone is out to get Kevin. This is not my favorite movie, but worth seeing. 4 stars
6/19/01 Xx-Bull-xX Mad Max on the water, but I really liked it. 4 stars
5/07/01 Gracy Lionheart Ugh...wasted my money at the theater. 1 stars
3/18/01 Soggy Bottom Boy Bad script, bad direction. A shame, in the right hands, could've been pretty cool. 2 stars
12/06/00 AtlantaBill Fishtar. 1 stars
12/04/00 Cristopher Revilla good acting, good action sequences, the need a n editor to edit all the shit in the plot 2 stars
9/30/00 Terrie Smith Some good moments in this waterlogged entry; Dennis Hopper should have drowned. 3 stars
7/09/00 Andrew Freeman Costner is sexy with fins 1 stars
4/15/00 malcolm looks like time for another baseball movie for KC 2 stars
3/16/00 Richard Wright A decent enough film. Confusing and thin plot is lit up by some good action sequences. 3 stars
3/02/00 Kyle Broflovski Ahh, piss...it wasn't all bad. It ain't "Star Wars", but it ain't "Ringmaster", either! 4 stars
10/25/99 Lame-Oh Not good. Love your review, Oz. 2 stars
9/11/99 the Grinch I hate Costner, but this is an o.k. roadwarrior ripoff no-brainer 3 stars
8/20/99 Japtalian I think Costner sucks but for some reason I like this movie. Bitchslap me! 4 stars
7/24/99 Hagbard Celine OK, I know this was a box-office bomb, but it's worth renting on video. 4 stars
3/11/99 Ah Dooey Stupid. Yet it has 1 word: Costner. Blah. And disgraceful, too. 1 stars
2/09/99 Gary They should have gone 100% with the Escape from NY type gags. Very week SciFi. 1 stars
1/28/99 donkey_dew Not bad, not too bad at all. 5 stars
1/26/99 {{{OZ}}} Dumb. But somehow watchable. Stupid. Yet it has a message. Costner. Ew. 2 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  28-Jul-1995 (PG-13)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  14-Sep-1995 (M)




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