by Scott Weinberg
OK, so the print ads are advertising this as a sort of 'Big Chill' for Generation X. Yeah, maybe if you suck all the humor, warmth and good acting out of 'The Big Chill' and replace it with moronic dialogue, pretentious directing, and a cast so wooden you could build a bridge out of 'em. Not completely terrible, but if you consider that a worthy endorsement, this is your kind of movie anyway.OK, first off--What's with the stupid title? Well, first this opus was called Last Night. That was used so they tried The Night Before, also used. Jell-O Shots was considered before they wisely decided on Body Shots. It's like "Whisper Down the Lane" Hollywood-style, and what we end up with is a title that means absolutely nothing. Had to get that out there.
"This silly dribble is meant to 'define a generation'? Please."
So we have our girls: Jane, Sarah, Whitney and Emma. They're all played by the same actress, I think. I figure the screenwriters didn't bother to give these gals a personality, so I don't think I should have to bother to describe them. They're pretty and they discuss blow jobs very explicitly and >ahem< vividly. They are those girls you guys see at the bar and you automatically know that they know how hot they are, and you wish you could bend them over and give 'em a good spank for their attitudes. Anyway, none of them are really likable, and you start to look forward to the first bad things that happen to them. Oh, and did I mention that this wonderful film also utilizes the trusty "the whole movie is a goddam flashback" thing?
So we have our guys: Rick, Michael, Shawn and Trent. They are as obnoxious and smug as the girls are obnoxious and pretty. So we have one guy for each girl, right? Sure, but first we have to withstand 85 minutes of dialogue like "Sex without love equals violence" and silly scenes of sex...on a car...in public.
Then there's this 45-minute detour into After-School Special Land where we get to see everyone cringe and cry after there may or may not have been a date rape. I count the unpopped shells on the floor in front of me, occassionally looking up in the hopes of catching a stray breast somewhere onscreen.
A few good points: Jerry O'Connell is pretty good here, actually. He's the most charming horny sleazebag and potential rapist in the whole movie. Seriously, though, the single best thing about Body Shots, aside from the flopping, is Ron Livingston. You may remember him from such films as Swingers and Office Space. In those movies, he was pretty laid-back and likable. Here, he goes absolutely nuts. Forget the fact that his character has absolutely no place (or real point) in this movie. He plays Trent as a confident, vulgar and just really damn funny playboy-wannabe. His performance alone rates this movie a little higher. And that's saying a lot.Vapid, self-important and directed seemingly through tan gauze or something. At random points, it actually has the actors' frozen faces stare out at you, while they preach to you in a voice-over. It's like some Noxzema commercial on Ecstasy only with sillier dialogue.
link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=1714&reviewer=128
originally posted: 10/29/99 16:33:45