To boldly go where Willam Shatner went a few years ago.Star Trek sucks. It's "Star Wars" written by that nerdy guy in your physics class who eats his hair. It's all the same stuff, but it's had the fun sucked out of it, just like your faithful physics nerd sucks out...hmmm, better to just leave that one be.
So, anyways, Captain Picard and his loyal band of kooky misfits go to this planet where everyone is young and churn butter and wear old clothes. "Planet of the Amish" was a suggested title. But then these freaky guys with weird skin that has to be stapled on start bombing the place and making the amish aliens disappear. Then Picard falls in love with one of them. And, just like anyone who falls in love with Magnum PI, her life immediately becomes in danger. Four people never to fall in love with: James Bond, Magnum, Mel Gibson, and good ol' Jean-Luc.
There's space battles, lasers, and Gilbert and Sullivan tunes. I guess the physics geek also happens to be a band fag as well.
Star Trek was never good, and it's worse now. Much like the Oscars, any project that gives Whoopi Goldberg work is automatically bad. Brent Spiner should stick to being the straight man in Walter Matthau-Jack Lemmon movies. Johnathan Frakes should be shot.
But I liked my movie going experience, because I got a big "A Bug's Life" pail full of popcorn.Mmm...popcorn.