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Overall Rating
3.11

Awesome: 19.16%
Worth A Look26.35%
Average: 19.76%
Pretty Bad: 15.57%
Total Crap: 19.16%

11 reviews, 101 user ratings


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Meet Joe Black
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by Scott Weinberg

"Did they even HIRE an editor?"
2 stars

There's a pretty OK movie buried in this big, dull blob. I can't even believe that there's so little so say about a movie over 3 hours long! Suffice to say there's like 5 characters, and they talk. A lot. This looks like an American attempt at 'smart talky drama' that the French make so often where people sit around and talk. A lot.

The main point I'd like you to take away from this review is the following statement: Claire Forlani is very, very pretty. (She could be the inspiration for the creation of photography if it didn't already exist, but it does.) She is one of the most photgenic actresses around today. Apparently, Martin (final cut) Brest feels the same way and just sticks a camera on Brad Pitt's shoulder. She smiles, she flirts, she looks away coyly--It's ALL HERE, folks! Anyway, she's Susan in this movie and she's damn hot. What else was in the movie? I mentioned Brad Pitt, who stammers and looks confused a lot. He's supposed to be playing death incarnate, but I never pictured Death as so friendly and child-like. (Are you supposed to wanna SLAP death in the face and tell him to pay attention?)

Anthony Hopkins is a huge communications magnate who senses his impending demise, when Joe appears and asks for a look around earth. Give the movie's ample running time, they see surprisingly little. Me? I'd take Death to Disney World and introduce him to hookers, joints and a few Black & Tans. I digress. THIS Death is happy enough sitting in board meetings, eating peanut butter, and mooning over Ms. High-Cheekbone.

There are many scenes involving conversation. I generally enjoy the art of dialogue, yet many scenes here felt like they were covering the same ground:

Susan: "I love you, Dad."

Dad: "I love you, too. Stay away from Joe. I love you."

Susan: "Where's Joe? I love you, Dad."

Hank Kingsley from The Larry Sanders Show: "Hey NOW! I'm in this movie too and I love both of you."

Dad: "I love you too. Get away from me. Where's all the goddam peanut butter?"

And on and on. I appreciate what the filmmakers set out to do, which I believe is just make a solid and satisfying romantic drama. Instead, our patience and bowels are tested through an absolutely interminable running time. What would easily have been an entertaining (albeit forgettable) movie starring the two prettiest faces on earth (no, NOT Hopkins) instead becomes a series of long and drawn-out scenes and about three too many finalés. (A small shout to Jeffrey Tambor and Jake Weber who do quite well in parts that should have been larger, all things considered.)

It's not really a BAD movie. Executives just need to tighthen the apron strings on the whole "Oh, your last movie was a huge surprise hit? Well, make ANYTHING you want? Running time? Ha, that's for Spike Lee!" thing. After all, it's not like Martin Brest is P.T. Anderson. (Although his subtle nuances in Beverly Hills Cop still stand greatly underrated to this day. Ahem.)

Rent the DVD, and hit FF at any random point. You'll get the same overall impression I did, and it will save you time to look at Claire Forlani in other movies. (If I could just get Minnie Driver, Claire Forlani, Jennifer Connelly, and Denise Richards in a Russ Meyer remake, I'd just retire and take up stamps.)

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=189&reviewer=128
originally posted: 02/11/00 10:57:36
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User Comments

10/11/17 Annick One of my favorite films 5 stars
10/10/17 Louise I switched off after 20 mins. Utter tripe. 1 stars
10/10/17 Louise I switched off after 20 mins. Utter tripe. 1 stars
8/17/17 David Hopkins - excellent as always, Pitt - decent job, Forlani's acting style - annoying & bad. 4 stars
2/12/17 Margaret Love it.Keep watching it over and over. Music beautiful.Pitt and Hopkins are great! 5 stars
8/29/15 ms. maestra I love this movie. It is my favorite Anthony Hopki s and my favorite Brad Pitt movie 5 stars
6/16/15 Bill Poignant, engrossing film. Musical score is magnificent. 4 stars
1/19/15 Paula Did not like Susan's acting. The movie had some potential but she was painful to watch 2 stars
4/02/13 G. Zullo Emgaging, provavitive & highly entertaining, an all-time favorite! 5 stars
3/23/12 Doug McW Intelligent, refreshing movie. A thinking person's movie that can be watched over and over. 5 stars
1/27/12 Leslie Great film, but a tad long 5 stars
11/22/11 RIFMAN Favorite All Time Movie. 5 stars
10/13/11 Dr.Lao Boring and creepy, hardly traits I associate with a romance movie 1 stars
8/05/11 Quigley There is no excuse for the running time. Not to mention it absolutely refused to end. 2 stars
7/27/11 Mark Interesting most of the negative comments are that it's too long, says more about the view. 4 stars
9/19/10 Spencer T. Chang This is one of my favorite movies, ever. Beautiful acting, score. Absolute movie magic. 5 stars
9/10/10 Sandra Excellent story to express many life lessons in understanding process of life and death. 5 stars
8/25/10 Jeff Slow and pretentious 2 stars
6/05/10 sehoy Great acting--loved Brad Pitt, Hopkins always wonderful. Didn't notice length 5 stars
5/16/10 Don Lawrence Outstanding movie and love the musical score as well. 5 stars
4/27/10 PAUL SHORTT ODD AND CONTRIVED 1 stars
2/15/10 johnny the actors and the characters they play are beautiful. 5 stars
2/10/10 John Zito A sombre gem,reminiscient of On The Beach,(1959),theres even a sountrack riff thats similar 5 stars
1/24/10 Doug 5 times viewed. Parrish is at his end, Black is at his beginning. So much more than a movie 5 stars
12/04/08 Crabes This is such a waste of talent, I can barely believe it 1 stars
11/18/08 Eric Southern First rate in every way; only simpletons could find fault. 5 stars
8/30/08 Shaun Wallner Interesting storyline. 4 stars
6/25/08 S.Whelan Great slow moving film, with brilliant performances by both Hopkins & Pitt 5 stars
6/14/08 kdog My favorite movie of all time. I didn't want it to end. Funny, romantic, great dialogue. 5 stars
3/19/08 Leah I think the BEST MOVIE of its kind EVER 4 stars
11/02/07 Lord Skeletor Probably One of the Most Stirring Flicks I've Ever Seen. 5 stars
1/11/07 David Pollastrini Pitt getting hit by the car was done perfectly 3 stars
11/18/06 Brad Bourland It has a good story, and good production values, and about 55 too many minutes 3 stars
11/09/06 Chuck How can you fags bitch about watching Claire Forlani for 3 hours? 4 stars
9/25/06 DELORAS RUTLEDGE I LOVED THE MOVIE IT'S A GREAT MOVIE 5 stars
5/05/06 ES Where's all the goddam peanut butter?"- I love that, the movie not so much 2 stars
4/11/06 Marquita Stokes I thought the movie was amazing that lended an intelligent deep perspective on life and lov 4 stars
2/24/06 TB Need to get rid of romance and stay with the story 3 stars
11/14/05 Krisan Long.... but good story line, could have shortened it a bit 4 stars
4/22/05 klee mindless dribble, do urse;f a favour & have ur eyes ripped out before you see this crap 1 stars
3/28/05 ramez the best ive seen 3 stars
9/26/04 david really good , brad pitt was awesome 5 stars
5/31/04 Gray you know how chick flicks have a reputation as sucky? well this craptacual film proves it! 1 stars
4/06/04 Amber Interesting outlook on death 4 stars
4/01/04 john long winded but well made 4 stars
3/21/04 Tiffany Thunderhurst A transcontinental snail race would be faster paced than this movie! 1 stars
2/23/04 Joe *snore* Long and Booooooooooooooooring 1 stars
11/27/03 Sumit Goel A wonderful movie with extremely powerful performances. 5 stars
11/23/03 Kris Huge disappointment! Harden's talent completely wasted. A predictable bore. 1 stars
10/05/03 Jake At three hours long sitting all the way through this movie is like being tortured 1 stars
7/25/03 RazieR This is one of the greatest movies ive seen. mr.pink...you are totally ignorant 5 stars
5/09/03 The Talking Elbow Maybe a good premise, but the presentation was all WRONG and it SUCKED 1 stars
4/25/03 mr. Pink Everybody's worst work. Pitt and Hopkins should've read the script one this one. 3 hours?!? 1 stars
4/07/03 Jack Sommersby Contrived and overlong but admittedly satisfying. Pitt could have used a lot more variety. 3 stars
10/30/02 Patrick this was very enjoyable. 4 stars
10/12/02 Natalia, Irina's friend agree 5 stars
10/12/02 Irina Best Death-theme interpretation ever seen 5 stars
8/14/02 MI I thorougly enjoyed the movie, despite the THREE hours it took to get to the end. 5 stars
8/12/02 R.W. Welch Leaden pacing and miscasting of Pitt just about sink this remake of Death Takes a Holiday. 3 stars
7/19/02 John Burkitt intriguing, engrossing 4 stars
3/05/02 Julia Cox Lightning-paced edge-of-your-seat thriller that ends all too soon! 1 stars
8/19/01 Dr. Thompson Not bad. Brad Pitt acts like hes on illegal medication. 4 stars
8/01/01 Natalie Brad Pitt and Claire Forlani are AWESOME!!! 5 stars
7/17/01 Piz If you're not in a hurry it's a good love story, Pitt's acting is actually tolerable here 4 stars
5/20/01 hgfc sucks all ass 1 stars
5/08/01 Gracy Lionheart Ugh...the only good thing is watching Brad Pitt. 2 stars
4/29/01 The Jedi Droid I only saw this because the new star wars trailer was showing. man what a long flick 3 stars
4/04/01 PALUCH Soft kind of movie,"..what great movies are all about" 4 stars
1/24/01 terrie smith Like watching paint dry; Hopkins better than the script & Forlani is exquisite. to watch. 3 stars
9/18/00 Paul This movie is too fucking long. So boring I almost fell into a coma 1 stars
9/17/00 JB Great look at the slow process of dying. Loved it!!! 5 stars
4/19/00 seldom scene long, but well acted and the film is never in a hurry, gives you time to ponder or predict. 4 stars
4/01/00 Tino Slaut A shocking mess of a film! Watching it is like snooping around at an airplane crash site. 1 stars
3/31/00 Arnaldo Cruz Well directed,powerfull, and way overlook 5 stars
3/21/00 Sam This movie suked big donkey balls. If you rent this movie you will be pissed 1 stars
2/23/00 Neil Austin Yawn. Utter Bilge 1 stars
9/24/99 KK Pitt Sucks Big Time!!!! Hopkins, what the hell were you thinking working with this loser??? 1 stars
9/06/99 Weird Andy O,Bergman! What crimes are committed in thy name! 1 stars
8/01/99 hum ok, much to long. makes me think id like to see the original 3 stars
7/12/99 Mudbug So boring I turned it off halfway. 2 stars
7/03/99 ADAM (OREOADAM@AOL.COM) THIS MOVIE SUCKED BIG ASS 1 stars
6/03/99 lucasd jackson this movie was good until Brad Pitt came into the movie 1 stars
4/12/99 Randall What was with all the complaining about length, it went quickly for me, i loved it 5 stars
4/05/99 Cool Thing BAM! Three hours of my life GONE! Wasted! Utter shite. Wasted premise. 1 stars
3/03/99 john morton I saw it in Italy, but how can death not know how to eat? lame Brad Pitt vehicle, no brain 1 stars
1/14/99 Melissa Another film that has been heavily criticized, but I enjoyed it. Hopkins is fabulous. 4 stars
1/11/99 Jaime Other than the fact that death never looked so good, this film has nothing to offer. 2 stars
1/10/99 Diogenesnutz This was one of the most unbelievably boring movies I've ever seen. 1 stars
1/08/99 john r Movie was entertaining although Pitt was rather stiff. Anthony Hopkins was outstanding. 3 stars
1/04/99 jlgallardo The story was not quite convincing. See it in theaters don't rent it, you will hate it. 3 stars
1/01/99 Movie Geezer haaated it---looong and stupid 2 stars
12/09/98 AnnieBee Death can speak in Island tongue but has never tasted peanut butter? Come on! 3 stars
12/06/98 Mr Showbiz Protracted, overindulgent remake of "Death Takes A Holiday". May just bore you to.. 3 stars
12/02/98 16 in, of swingin' meat and a bucket of balls Great cinematography, great cast, but it was damn near 3 hrs.long, but it was good! 4 stars
12/01/98 Bluntman Anthony Hopkins is wonderful, clever lines, a fine story- all and all entertaining. 4 stars
11/25/98 Callie The original picture "Death Takes a Holiday" really can't be topped. But Brad is AOK !!!!!! 4 stars
11/23/98 Daniel A girlie flick...might as well see Point Break with a better script. 3 stars
11/23/98 Freyja 3 words. Brad Pitt naked. 5 stars
11/21/98 Zantwerp Absoluetely one of the best films of the year. The cinematography was incredible!!! 5 stars
11/11/98 Tina 3 hrs of pitt living vicariously through hopkins & a feeble atempt at acting by forlani 3 stars
10/19/98 Dark Horizons A really amazing film. Visually just stunning, some really excellent dialogue. 5 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  13-Nov-1998 (PG-13)
  DVD: 08-Feb-2005

UK
  N/A

Australia
  11-Mar-1999 (M)




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