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Overall Rating
3.02

Awesome: 11.76%
Worth A Look: 22.35%
Average31.76%
Pretty Bad: 24.71%
Total Crap: 9.41%

8 reviews, 37 user ratings


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Small Soldiers
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by Chris Parry

"Freaky flick. Holds your interest and doesn't shame itself often."
3 stars

The door was open. Nobody attending it. Movie was just starting. What the hell. I'll endure.

Nice move. This ain't the worst film I've seen this summer, in fact it's pretty good in parts.

It's the story of a toy company who uses bad military chips in a nw brand of action figures. The action figures then start killing each other off, and causing havoc.

The twist in this tiger's tail is that the action get's kinda real, kinda dangerous, kinda (in places) scary. This film, once it get's started is something that will give you nightmares.

A litany of celebrity voices (what the heck is with this trend? Don't these people get enough cash already without putting voice-over people out of work?) make-up the characters and the late great Phil Hartman puts in a show (which in itself is kinda freaky), Jay Mohr and Denis Leary don't shame themselves, but do nothing for their careers either....

It's a worthwhile video day flick. Too weird for kids, too uncool for teens and too kiddy for adults, but not a bad piece if you sit down and watch it without worrying about the seven bucks you forked over.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=29&reviewer=1
originally posted: 08/14/98 08:03:37
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User Comments

3/31/13 TrueBada$$Chick Why were the Farbies in camouflage bikinis & spouting sexist, instead of war, phrases? 1 stars
2/13/11 PAUL SHORTT WATCHABLE, QUIRKY SATIRE WITH GREAT COMPUTER ANIMATION 3 stars
11/10/10 jack its on cartoon network right now, and it is pissiing me off 1 stars
3/29/08 Pamela White fantastic story and cute amination 4 stars
2/16/07 Vip Ebriega A darker use of the 'Toy Story' idea of living toys. 4 stars
1/14/07 WHAT "I much prefer this to Toy Story"? Rob, were you high when you wrote this review? 2 stars
9/28/06 David Cohen Mean spirited, wimpy heroes, cop-out ending, defines total crap 1 stars
12/29/05 Evan low budget CRAP! 2 stars
8/18/05 ES The army men in toy story were far superior 2 stars
6/22/05 darick OK but...does this movie belong to any category? 3 stars
1/15/05 Jeff Anderson Not Joe Dante's best, but great special effects and a good cast save it. 3 stars
11/25/04 joe it was a funnie and dermend movie 4 stars
11/22/03 ross hendrick Far too scary 3 stars
5/02/03 Jon Lyrik Not bad, but rips off a few elements from Toy Story and is a tad stupid. 3 stars
10/11/02 SiliconHero Another crappy movie bites the dust...RIP Phil Hartman. 2 stars
4/26/02 Jennifer dah stupidest movie ever 1 stars
10/02/01 Andrew Carden The Action Holds Your Attention, Pretty Stupid Though. 3 stars
8/09/01 E-Funk Completely in the Joe Dante tradition...a warm welcome back from a 5-year hiatus. 5 stars
5/07/01 Gracy Lionheart The only part I remember is Dunst smashing barbie like dolls. BoRiNg 2 stars
3/06/00 Kyle Broflovski Cat-piss cocktail. That one extra star is for the soundtrack, and ONLY the soundtrack. 2 stars
10/30/99 Bozo Ditto J-Dogg (below) word for word 1 stars
7/04/99 J-Dogg Dante's got another shit-flick, too violent for children, too stupid for adults. Trash it. 1 stars
6/21/99 Ed Wood Death to the Gorgonites! You'll LOVE this movie! Hilarious from beginning to end 5 stars
3/17/99 Go Swans Nasty, nasty, nasty film. Where was it supposed to be entertaining? 2 stars
12/20/98 Jeff **** 4 stars
11/28/98 Mr.Pink Childish and moronic stupidity. 1 stars
11/14/98 Rageboy This movie was really cool! Smart, Funny, Action! 5 stars
11/05/98 Bad Kosh Wait... those G.I. Joe toys are the villains? What do you know! Fair movie, but take some. 4 stars
9/20/98 MR HOLLYWOOD pure SHIT!!,too violent for kiddies and too boring for biggies,waste of money!!! 1 stars
9/07/98 Damien This movie was cool, everybody failed to see the satire in it, Joe Dante rules! 4 stars
9/06/98 Noah I think that this movie was basically Toy Story on Crack. Ultra-Violent in parts. 3 stars
9/06/98 Gary Interesting premise but missed the boat / Bargain Matinee only 3 stars
8/28/98 Aslan the lion This movie is tight, i loved every minute of it... seen it 5 times 5 stars
8/24/98 The Capital City Goofball I really liked it. Not just for kids, though take some. 4 stars
8/23/98 Mister Whoopee Phil Hartman getting shot at. Spooky. 2 stars
8/16/98 Johny Good effects, little else 2 stars
8/13/98 {{OZ}} For a kid's movie, this was pretty scary. Seriously. 3 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  10-Jul-1998 (PG-13)
  DVD: 08-Feb-2005

UK
  N/A

Australia
  17-Sep-1998 (PG)




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