Overall Rating
 Awesome: 4.42%
Worth A Look: 21.24%
Average: 8.85%
Pretty Bad: 12.39%
Total Crap: 53.1%
6 reviews, 77 user ratings
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| Ghosts of Mars |
by Scott Weinberg
"Who is this filmmaker masquerading as John Carpenter?"
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John Carpenter's latest film features evil spirits who inhabit the bodies of previously normal human beings. Based on Carpenter's recent track record, I'm beginning to think that the director himself has also been possessed...by the spirit of Ed Wood.Everyone who knows me is aware of my devotion to John Carpenter. The Fog, The Thing and Halloween rank among my favorite horror movies, and I've always had a soft spot for the B-movie charm of Big Trouble in Little China, Escape from New York and They Live! But while some people would be more forgiving to their favorite filmmakers, I've come to hold certain directors to a higher standard. (Releasing four successive turkeys at this stage in your career is nearly unforgivable.) It would be a severe understatement to say that Carpenter's last few films were not up to this standard. (My apologies to the dozens of people who enjoyed Vampires, Village of the Damned AND Escape from L.A.. You are truly more of a Carpenter fan than I am.)
Filmmaking is a difficult business. In order to make things considerably easier, many filmmakers simply revert back to their earlier bags of tricks, and the result is a film as pointless as it is familiar. No movie fits this description better than Ghosts of Mars. The plot is lifted almost entirely from Carpenter's debut film, Assault on Precinct 13, and the less important plot devices are culled from about a half-dozen other (equally unoriginal) action/sci-fi/horror movies. I'm not saying that a B-movie pastiche can't be a good time; I'm just saying that this particular one is pretty damn weak.
As the film opens, we quickly realize that this is a flashback movie, which is surely the laziest screenwriting technique ever devised. Not content with being merely unoriginal, Carpenter unwisely decides to layer these flashbacks one on top of another, and the result is poor pacing, uninvolving plot threads and an overall air of dramaticus interruptus. On more than one occasion, a character will start out saying "Well, Carter and I decided to explore the cave...", and the film quickly lurches to a sequence that has nothing to do with the film at all, one in which people explore a cave. Look, Carpenter. Tell me a story or show me a story. It doesn't work both ways.
The plot is nothing more than your no-frills "building under seige" affair, with various drab characters bouncing off the sets until each one is sliced open by the marauding martians. (I just made the movie sound more fun than it really is.) Some of the characters are interstellar cops while others are deep-space criminals. These distinctions matter not one iota, as the characters are simply presented as "human" or "martian". Humans are the good guys. The Martians (who, it turns out, simply want their home planet left alone) are the bad guys.
As the head lady space-cop, Natasha Henstridge gives a better performance than the film deserves, because she seems to know how silly the whole affair is. (Plus she's really gorgeous.) Ice Cube is on hand as the reputedly evil villain, but if you think he doesn't join up with the cops to save humanity, well then you may just consider this movie the pinnacle of all things fresh and original. A reliably familiar stable of character actors fill in the supporting roles, and they range from strong (Jason Statham) to weak (Joanna Cassidy) to almost invisible (Clea DuVall).
Even the barest of cinematic essentials are ignored in this film. The screenplay is simply atrocious, most of the acting performances could best be described as "tree-like" and the villains are simply insipid. With a plot stolen directly from last year's Pitch Black, there's literally nothing in this movie you haven't seen before. OK, you've never seen a skinny blond woman with large breasts beat up the rather rotund Ice Cube, but that's hardly worth a rental fee.
Aside from two brief (yet exciting) battle sequences, there is literally nothing of interest in Ghosts of Mars. The plot threads, characters, themes and ideas were considered "old hat" probably 20 years ago. Carpenter may not be the same filmmaker he was 20 years ago, but surely his fans deserve a little more effort than what's on display here. Call it contractual obligations, or call it "losing your edge", but this guy is fast becoming a hollow shell of a filmmaker.I'm not the type to bash a "popcorn movie" for not being Macbeth, but even B-movie genre fare needs to be held to some kind of standard. It pains me to criticize a filmmaker I hold in such high esteem, but here's the bottom line: If John Carpenter had made this movie for his debut 20 years ago, today he'd be flipping burgers somewhere. Here's hoping this modern master of cinematic horror regains his bearings and starts working on some quality schlock, as opposed to continuing to churn out tired out tripe like Ghosts of Mars.
link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=5345&reviewer=128
originally posted: 11/13/01 12:42:29
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USA
24-Aug-2001 (R)
UK
N/A
Australia
25-Oct-2001 (M)
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