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Overall Rating

Awesome: 0%
Worth A Look: 13.79%
Average: 10.34%
Pretty Bad55.17%
Total Crap: 20.69%

2 reviews, 17 user ratings

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Joe Somebody
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by EricDSnider

"Tonight, on a Very Special Episode of 'Tim Allen Sucks.'"
2 stars

Tell me if this sounds familiar: A well-meaning but weak man is embarrassed by a bully in front of his family, vows to get revenge by fighting the guy, and in the process of preparing, his family gains new respect for him, he becomes a better person, and he realizes violence is not the answer. In the end, everyone is proud of everyone, and there are hugs all around.

It's a sitcom, right? One half-hour episode of a TV sitcom. Right?

No, sucker! It's an entire FULL-LENGTH MOVIE, called "Joe Somebody." It's three times as long as a TV sitcom, but with just as much depth, a bit more swearing, and probably fewer laughs. You won't like it, but it's my job to tell you about it anyway, so I will.

Tim Allen plays Joe Scheffer, a nobody who gets slapped around by a mean guy (Patrick Warburton) in his company's parking lot, with his daughter Natalie (Hayden Panettiere) as a witness. He tells the guy he's going to fight him in three weeks to avenge his honor, and in the meantime seeks the martial-arts expertise of a washed-up action-movie actor (James Belushi).

Also in the meantime, he becomes an office celebrity. Everyone hates the bully, and even though Joe hasn't actually stood up to him yet, they're glad he's planning to. He becomes a Somebody, and a co-worker named Meg (Julie Bowen) starts to fall in love with him.

The movie is from first-time writer John Scott Shepherd, and director John Pasquin. Pasquin previously directed Allen in the "Home Improvement" TV show, as well as in "The Santa Clause" and "Jungle2Jungle." He's very familiar with Allen, so he knows just how to coax that special Tim Allen magic out of him: Make him act like a clueless imbecile, and make sure he gets whacked in the groin every few minutes. Instant comedy!

(Side note: The daughter, Natalie, is impossibly precocious, and the actress who plays her looks like Jonathan Taylor Thomas, who played Allen's son on "Home Improvement." It's creepy.)

James Belushi earns a few laughs as the has-been movie star, and there are assorted chuckles elsewhere, too. But the overall impact is so slight and transparent. The comedy is broad, simple and amateurish. If you've watched even a few TV sitcoms, you've seen everything this movie has to offer -- but in much less time.

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originally posted: 12/21/01 08:45:36
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User Comments

3/29/08 Pamela White stupid plot and Allen cannot carry the show 2 stars
11/22/07 Monday Morning Jack Sommersby, I'll bet you have. 4 stars
3/03/06 Anthony Feor Its not the greatest 2 stars
12/15/05 Jeff Anderson Two words:James Belushi! He provides the only good moments in this smug & unfunny "comedy". 2 stars
8/25/05 ES You really feel bad when he gets embarrassed in front of his kid 4 stars
7/25/04 Katie I'm watching it right now and it's not that bad! 3 stars
12/01/03 *A Monotonous Creton Who Loves Tom Hulce* for Belushi 3 stars
12/29/02 Jack Sommersby I've seen bowel movements more preferable. 1 stars
6/02/02 Chris There's some charm here there's also no reason to see this movie. 2 stars
5/26/02 Priscilla Postlethwaite Allen hardly wrenching; Bowen narrow in acting range. Belushi steals what show there is. 3 stars
5/26/02 Peter Klein It's obvious that a society that breeds and needs the undesirable would hate a family show! 4 stars
3/06/02 Julia Cox Watchable after rebounding a bit from annoying mannerisms and dumb male stereotypes. 4 stars
1/18/02 Melissa in NYC Hey Tim, do us all a favor and stick to being Buzz Lightyear. 1 stars
1/13/02 The Boy In The Designer Bubble Tim Allen should be sent to jail for this piece of crap. I walked out!! 1 stars
12/30/01 Todd This movie is worse than Hitler. 1 stars
12/27/01 Spiderman Stupid, silly, childish nonsense. Should have never been greenlighted! 1 stars
12/27/01 Shawn Burden Sucks mother fucking cock more than Kirsten Raby does! Pure shit!!!!!!!!!!! 1 stars
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  21-Dec-2001 (PG)



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