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Overall Rating
2.5

Awesome: 20%
Worth A Look: 0%
Average: 0%
Pretty Bad70%
Total Crap: 10%

1 review, 4 user ratings


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Corporation, The (1996)
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by Scott Weinberg

"Betcha didn't know that Ian Ziering showed his ass in a movie once!"
2 stars

The Corporation seems like the brainchild of 3 movie execs who aim to conceive a movie while completely high on marijuana. How’s THIS for a recipe? (Read on...)

”We take The Firm, that Cruise flick that’s ripped off more often than a hotel bathrobe, mix it with something old like The Stepford Wives, throw in a few pointless sex scenes, hire one of those 90210 freaks, and get Roger Corman to sign the check! Andrew Stevens will direct. He’d direct rush hour traffic for two donuts and cab fare. Oh, and call the Mom from E.T.. We need someone to overact and humiliate themselves badly.”

”Which 90210 kid? The short little Michael J. Fox clone, or the tall brooding James Dean wannabe?”

”No, I was thinking that bland lifeless blonde one! The one that’s NEVER BEEN IN A MOVIE before!”

”Ian Ziering???” Does he have an agent? Does he even have a phone?”

And thus the cable-flick The Corporation was born. And no, I didn’t make any of that stuff up just to desperately milk a laugh out of you. This movie WAS produced by Roger Corman, it DOES star “Steve Sanders from Beverly Hills 90210”, Dee-Wallace Stone does show up to ravenously chew the scenery, and those extraneous sex scenes I mentioned? Best bits in the whole damn movie.

Ziering plays a brilliant (how does one type a giggling sound?) software designer recently hired by America’s most powerful game designer. Logically, he shows up with his skeptical young wife, is offered a gorgeous new home, amazing cars, a sexy secretary, and a lengthy line of credit – and then quickly discovers this his new employers are up to some decidedly unsavory shenanigans. (Any of this sound like The Firm yet?)

The evil plot this time around is ‘mind control’. Seems the video game execs have hatched a plan in which they can – through the use of subliminal messages – hip-mo-tize their customers into buying whatever they’re told. But it doesn’t stop at simple consumerism, no no. These evil video game manufacturers decide to implant even NASTIER messages into their games, hidden impulse notes like “Go commit suicide”, “Cheat on your wife”, and (if we follow the logic through to its natural conclusion) “Ian Ziering is a good actor”.

Before it’s all over, a few unimportant characters are dead, a few annoying characters remain irritatingly alive, the villain’s nefarious plan of world-domination-through-Pacman is thwarted, oh and there are a few pointless sex scenes…which I believe I mentioned as this hilariously campy turkey’s saving grace. At the very least, The Corporation offers adulterous husbands a refreshingly brand-new excuse when their next divorce proceedings roll around:

“Your honor! I didn’t mean to fuck my secretary! Tetris BRAINWASHED me into doing it!”

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=6099&reviewer=128
originally posted: 08/15/02 05:09:04
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User Comments

10/25/05 kjelly pretty bad 2 stars
4/30/05 Dave A pile of steaming dog shit! 1 stars
7/07/03 peter kialdas pretty good 5 stars
11/15/02 sbestosLee wow, so awesome 5 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  02-Aug-1996 (R)

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