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Overall Rating
3.57

Awesome: 18.1%
Worth A Look58.1%
Average: 4.76%
Pretty Bad: 0.95%
Total Crap: 18.1%

7 reviews, 63 user ratings


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American Wedding
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by Chris Parry

"I've been had! People told me this didn't suck! Bastards!"
1 stars

I'm generally down with the whole teen sex comedy genre, as a rule. I like boobies as much as the next guy, and stupid humor can be very filling when you have the right appetite going, but I have to say I've never been so disappointed by a highly recommended film than I was watching this mess. Everything stank, from the acting to the editing to the music to the writing. Throw Matthew Perry in the thing and every critic on the planet would have despised this movie, but I guess enough folks still have a soft spot for Stiffler and a hard spot for Band Camp to get American Wedding over the line.

Is a description of storyline even necessary at this point? Jim (Jason Biggs), who is still constantly nervy, is getting married to Michelle (Alyson Hannigan), who is still constantly sexually aroused, while Jim's dad (Eugene Levy) is still constantly saying, "oh dear," and Stiffler is constantly eating dog poop and humping things.

Clearly Orson Welles was a pussy.

There's just nothing here at all worth recommending. Directed by Bob Dylan's son (I'll not honor him by saying his first name, because on the talent shown here he deserves little more than a lifetime of being called "son of Bob"), every scene is punctuated (or should I say pounded) by loud rock music. And by loud, I mean LOUD. It's as if someone is sitting behind you in the theater with a boombox, playing Avril Lavigne as two characters on screen walk quietly through the park.

Want proof? There are 39 pieces of music credited in this 93-minute film, which means there's a new song playing every 2 minutes and 18 seconds. Think about that now - if each song plays for one minute, that's barely a 1:18 gap between each track. MY EARS!

Then there's Alyson Hannigan, proving the old rule that there's nothing more tragic than a 30-year-old woman to pass as a teenager. She tries valiantly to make the old geeky gal shtick work, but it just seems wrong. Possibly because the writer of this monstrosity, regular Pie scribe Adam Herz, has only ever written one true female character - hers - amid dozens and dozens of dumb chicks and sex objects.

And then there's Stiffler. Man, this routine is getting old real fast. Is it a spoiler to say he eats a poodle stool? Probably not, this being Stiffler and all. But while his character was understandable and even empathetic when he was a dumb teenager (or at least playing one), now it just seems forced, ignorant, and entirely not believable. I didn't laugh at Stiffler once this time around, and the first couple of times he filled this role I at least snickered guiltily.

Directing a feature film is really hard and, though I'm sure everyone involved in American Wedding had a really good time, that doesn't generally mean they did a really good job. Plot-wise, there's nothing here beyond "let's hope Stiffler doesn't mess up the wedding...", which really is a sub-plot dressed as an actual storyline.

But if this were all funny, you could possibly forgive all the incompetent aspects of the production and just contentedly go along for a big, dumb ride. Unfortunately, the jokes are the kind that would leave fourteen-year-old boys laughing - and nobody else .

Extremely forgettable, totally non-recommendable, and quite frankly a waste of time and money. Let the good times end here, so everyone involved can get on with playing grown-up roles.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=7858&reviewer=1
originally posted: 04/24/04 15:33:54
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User Comments

3/25/10 Dane Youssef Aworthy finale. Great to see they found a way to make it all end on the best possible note. 5 stars
1/27/09 wes realy funny and cool 5 stars
8/03/08 Tyler THE BEST OF THE BUNCH! AWESOME FILM! 5 stars
10/18/07 Beau this is an average sequel to the previous ones, not the best but had moments 'FOCUS FOCUS' 3 stars
4/02/07 fools♫gold The high point of the trilogy (the three that matter). 4 stars
10/30/06 AJ Muller "Fucking right, doggie - that's a good flick!" So sayeth Stifler; so shall it be. 4 stars
3/12/06 JM Synth They're not even trying anymore 1 stars
9/27/05 Daveman A waste of everyone's time. Hardly watchable. 1 stars
8/25/05 Eden I really enjoyed the first two but this is crap. Would never watch it again 1 stars
7/23/05 Clubber Lang It is what it is, and it's very funny. Second best of the series, after 2. 4 stars
4/10/05 Cheryl Mayfield Probably tops first two, even if Stiffler has to stuff dog shit in his mouth to do it. 4 stars
1/19/05 Charlène I saw this film and I think it was unapologetically witty and gleeful 5 stars
11/18/04 Chris Belldo I've taken funnier shits. Imagine American Pie ass-raped w/out lube or a reach-around. 1 stars
10/25/04 hudson wow! 5 stars
10/23/04 ODH Stifler steals the show, very funny 4 stars
9/10/04 jeff pretty funny for a teen movie. 4 stars
9/04/04 Ghetto Smurf Jason Biggs' acting got better while everyone else's got worse. Still, good movie. 4 stars
8/03/04 Anthony G fuck this 1 stars
7/23/04 Samuel As good as the first two, if not better. 5 stars
7/21/04 Littlepurch Won't be liked by all but I loved it. Some real cringingly hilarious moments! 4 stars
7/08/04 Denise Duspiva No where near as good as the first two 3 stars
7/03/04 J HILARLIOUS!!! Stiffler is funny but a mental a**Hole!!! 5 stars
5/26/04 Daveman Fucking shit. The worst film I saw in 2003. 1 stars
4/26/04 eve dont take it 2 seriously! how old r u anyway? 5 stars
4/12/04 cinkcool awesome 5 stars
1/08/04 KICK ASS OR DONT COME HOME! practically the whole movie was on stifler and jim and michelle were barely in it,still fun 4 stars
1/03/04 Gray needed Chick for finch other than MILF 4 stars
1/03/04 A F They were trying a little too hard. Stiffler is getting a little played out. 4 stars
11/14/03 orangefactory Best among the American Pie series! 5 stars
11/10/03 Long River surprisingly dumb 1 stars
10/31/03 Natasha Bly Awesome if they do part 4 to pair Finch with someone better than S's mom; average otherwise 4 stars
10/31/03 Barry End of fuckin story? Character most like me stuck with Stiffler's mom? Gross!!! Bogus!!! 3 stars
10/22/03 Cheryl Mayfield Probably tops first two, even if Stiffler has to stuff dog shit in his mouth to do it. 4 stars
10/10/03 I've Got Worms The movie didn't show entirely what I wanted to see Lezys 3 stars
9/10/03 snowconehead falls somewhere between heh and meh. 4 stars
9/01/03 Jimmy James too forced, too unfunny. and i wanted to like it :( 2 stars
9/01/03 hando surprisingly funny! 4 stars
8/31/03 Marc The best movie ever 5 stars
8/25/03 Jimmeh Johnez HBS used to not suck. Now popups and BS all the time. 3 stars
8/24/03 I Would In the grand tradition of American Pie films, it's formulaic, it's dumb and it's not funny. 1 stars
8/21/03 Jack Bourbon Stifler is my hero 4 stars
8/18/03 Koitus Agree, that it has 5-6 scenes that are GREAT! Nikki Ziering topless also helps! :-) 4 stars
8/17/03 Lord Chu Hilarious and, incredible as it seems, just as sweet and heartfelt. 5 stars
8/16/03 Croweater I really liked it, it was sooooo funny ;-) 4 stars
8/16/03 Roundman Terrible. So far over the top that it didn't even seem to be an American Pie movie. 1 stars
8/14/03 mcw more zany than ever 4 stars
8/12/03 LoudChris 2nd best movie of the year! 5 stars
8/10/03 Ahnold Sucked. Series of lame gag-situations and gross-out scenes. Horrible. 1 stars
8/08/03 j lo jiggle that ass 1 stars
8/08/03 LoLo This is BY FAR the best out of the American trilogy! I laughed so hard I was almost crying! 5 stars
8/08/03 Winternight I laughed my ass off. 5 stars
8/08/03 JJ from da block Another freakin teeny bopper flick...I'd almost rather watch JLo's jigglin ass in jigli 1 stars
8/06/03 Frank Riccilli BULL DYKES FOR LIFE 5 stars
8/05/03 Bam Margera Laugh Out Loud. 'Nuff Said. Stifler indeed stole the show yet again. 5 stars
8/05/03 Desperado A great ending to a perfect trilogy 5 stars
8/05/03 I FUCK PIE NeVeR Say LALLA! 1 stars
8/05/03 Tyler Funny 4 stars
8/04/03 FrayLo actually entertaining, i expected less, got more. 4 stars
8/04/03 Joman fucking awsome 5 stars
8/04/03 Nicole Pretty funny, though starting to get a bit old 4 stars
8/02/03 Jason Kallelis Huh. Actually pretty damn good. Was surprised. 4 stars
8/02/03 Doug Totally lost the 'feel' of the first one, but still good 4 stars
8/02/03 bob mckenzie a worthy conclusion to a funny trilogy 4 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  01-Aug-2003 (R)
  DVD: 02-Jan-2004

UK
  N/A

Australia
  07-Aug-2003




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