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Overall Rating
2.67

Awesome: 9.76%
Worth A Look: 25%
Average: 18.29%
Pretty Bad: 16.46%
Total Crap30.49%

10 reviews, 104 user ratings


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End of Days
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by Greg Muskewitz

"Just the average everyman macho movie"
3 stars

No matter what anyone else says, I've always been an Arnold Schwarzenegger fan, and the majority of the time, his action movies are the best of the lot. However, "End of Days" came up somewhat short for my taste, though I'd like to think that the everyman out there can still enjoy his adrenaline and macho romp. It's not that there weren't good things about the film, but the hero's been missing in action too long since "Eraser."

There was a lot of "End of Days" which just wasn't very conducive; the normality in which the blood should have been flowing was blocked. Things seemed out of place, or just didn't work at all. Plainly, I was disappointed.

Take the story, for instance. Schwarzenegger works for some sort of bodyguard company. After the first few minutes of the film, we see him sitting in the depths of his dark apartment looking very sweaty and holding a gun to his head. Within a minute, his partner and friend, Kevin Pollack I think, bursts in the door, and there's a quick bonding ceremony where Jericho (that's Arnie's character's name, but usually he is just referred to as Jer) makes a smoothie of coffee, eggs, Chinese food, pizza from the floor, and a few other things which he picks up from the counter.

On the job, they're bringing a Wall Street bigwig from point a to point b. He is played by Gabriel Byrne, and the body of "the man" is being used by Satan as a host. He's shot at, and the assassin is chased by Jer (by helicopter, by foot), and eventually they find out that this guy is a priest. With his tongue cut out.

Suddenly, Jer has an interest in what's going on; following the path he did in his old days as a cop, before his wife and daughter were killed, he starts to investigate the case. What we find out is that a specific girl, whose birth we witnessed at the very beginning of the film (20 years prior), whose name is Christine York (CHRIST in YORK --heh heh...no!). She's intended to be "f*cked" by Satan, and, being the bearer of his child, will help end the world as we know it [insert lyrics here from REM]. Of course, Satan must find her, and do her, and Jer must find her as well.

A lot of the movie just didn't seem right. It was muddled, but sometimes I felt like I was over-scrutinizing the film. So afterwards, I went home and popped "Eraser" into the VCR to see it for the umpteenth time. Yeah, there were some plot holes and all, but nothing that had me in constant disbelief.

I think the biggest problem here was the script. It was so layman in terms; a lot of the dialogue seemed dumbed down to try and fit the level of its audience --and it undershot itself. During this year we've had a slew of ghost films, starting with "The Sixth Sense," "Stir of Echoes," and more of a haunting/possesion S movie, "Stigmata." "Stigmata" went into a religious conspiracy dissection, which I liked, and then there was the Catholic-protested "Dogma," which also waged the battle between God and Satan (well, not really Satan, but some of his disciples). Both "Stigmata" and "Dogma" worked in there repective genres much better than "End of Days" because those films were well proportioned. They knew what they were talking about, and used at least falsified evidence to back it up. I kept waiting for Alanis Morissette to show up and slap the Hell out of Byrne.

Arnold looked like he was in the back seat for this one. There were times during the movie where he had to shout obscenities, mostly "f*ck," and it didn't sound like something he would say. He didn't look too happy about saying them either. The beatings that his character took were well beyond the suspension of our disbelief. He was in Terminator-mode, and no matter how bad he was beat, sliced, pounded, knocked out of windows, shot at, etc., he kept on going. When I read that in the end he was going to choose faith over his 9mm Glock, I thought it would have been a real show of faith. But he just stands there, gets whooped, and then when Satan enters him, he must fight him internally to make sure Christine (Robin Tunney) can get away.

Director Peter Hyams's last film, "The Relic," was a much more intense, scary, and actioned movie. I give him credit here for trying to follow through with his vision, but there were too many plot crises to get in the way of it. There were areas which worked perfectly, but there were so many others which were just clogged.

Robin Tunney, as much as I love the name Robin, is not up to par with the movie. She doesn't fit, her acting is usually not adequate, and the way her character was written made her often just unlikable. I think one of her "The Craft" alumni, Neve Campbell, could have made something else altogether out of the role.

The special effects were pretty cool, and the movie's action *was* good, but its surroundings reeked, and that sucks because I really would have liked to like the movie. But the script just has no idea where it's going, and when it gets in a rut, it depends on blasting its way out. And its handling of religious issues were so bleak and not there, it wasn't funny.

Final Verdict: C+

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=798&reviewer=172
originally posted: 11/24/99 03:40:21
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User Comments

10/30/16 morris campbell it rips of the exorcist & and rosemarys baby good effects though still it sux 1 stars
7/28/14 The Hammer Schwarzenegger crucified! Satan fuses a mother & daughter during an orgy! Devilishly Good 4 stars
3/14/10 PAUL SHORTT NASTY AND OVER-THE-TOP 1 stars
8/29/09 the dork knight The Devil Pees gasoline? 4 stars
8/13/08 Shaun Wallner Great Action!! 5 stars
8/10/08 Bnorm I wouldnt have elected him after seeing this turd thats for sure 1 stars
10/24/07 Ivana Mann The best of the worst laugh-till-you-pee millenium "thrillers." 1 stars
4/24/07 Indrid Cold Byrne never actually does anything cool. Contrast with Al Pacino in Devil's Advocate. 2 stars
1/16/07 David Pollastrini saw it but have no memory so it must have sucked 3 stars
2/20/06 Ronin Horrible script from the purely logical point of view. Arnold OK, Robin Tunney v. cute. 2 stars
10/30/05 chris good film i enjoyed it fully 5 stars
2/11/05 Jeff Anderson All I could possibly say is, I liked it a lot better than STIGMATA & LOST SOULS! FUN!!!!!!! 4 stars
4/29/04 X Just terrible 1 stars
3/17/04 Brando FAH! 1 stars
2/10/04 Whatevr This movie caused my eyes to bleed 1 stars
11/29/03 john end of arnold 1 stars
9/10/03 Dreafre As a friday night TV diversion it has its moments 4 stars
3/04/03 Jack Sommersby Uneven and silly, but also very entertaining. A guilty pleasure. 4 stars
1/14/03 CAPTAIN FOX GREAT FILM OVERALL ARNOULDS BEST EVER 5 stars
10/27/02 MarktheShark6 Hey, at least the soundtrack was decent, right? 1 stars
7/12/02 KMG When they say end of days they really mean end of good movies 3 stars
4/06/02 Junshi Um...I'm not sure I remember anything but errm...the plot is utterly worthless. 1 stars
3/29/02 Evan The Critic I'll go to church when I want to learn about the bible. Go rent Total Recall instead 2 stars
3/02/02 Alan Smithee Nothing but a complete pile of shit. 1 stars
1/14/02 Magnum Craphole The most embarassing thing Arnold ever did. Pure garbage. 1 stars
12/15/01 Cracked head One of the stupidest movies ever made. 1 stars
11/30/01 The $1.98 Pyramid Poor Byrne. What a fallout since "The Usual Suspects." 2 stars
11/25/01 Cookie Cutter An insult. 1 stars
8/08/01 Mr. Hat Not asgoodas I expected,but scary if U see it when 1st released.Past y2k,no scare no flare. 2 stars
8/06/01 badfish First i love Arnie.That said this was a big piece of stinky Yak dung! 1 stars
7/15/01 officer 412/l arnie you've past it. you are to old to be doing action movies and you cant act. 1 stars
7/08/01 Gracy Lionheart Pure Arnie Junk. I love action films, but this blew big time. 1 stars
6/12/01 Crisis Management This movie sucks, and Chef ADogg proves again he's a total idiot with no clue whatsoever. 1 stars
5/01/01 TNT-6 "This movie is shit" and laughing their ass off. That's how everybody was in the theater. 1 stars
4/23/01 Luke Arnie Arnie Arnie! 4 stars
4/05/01 hum wow this is dumb! Did the writters do ANY research? 1 stars
3/25/01 Monster W. Kung Arnie, what the hell happened to you... this one BLOWS DONKEYS! 1 stars
1/26/01 Diego Romero Its just pure Arnie action 4 stars
1/17/01 The Terminator Probalbly Schwarenegger's most underrated movie 4 stars
1/15/01 Action freak Dark thriller, I liked it 4 stars
1/11/01 Jason Rowlands End of Days rocks! It shows that even the Devil can be outwitted. 5 stars
12/31/00 R.W. Welch Pretty well done villain, otherwise not much. 2 stars
12/24/00 bub you are all going to hell for comments like that!!!!!!!! 5 stars
10/27/00 JC23 I really enjoyed this movie 4 stars
9/27/00 Terrie Smith Arnie's done better but the film has its moments; good visual effects. 4 stars
6/22/00 Visc I don't care what other people say, this is a good movie. 4 stars
6/04/00 OS Oh come on, this movie isn't that bad 4 stars
6/02/00 Wafer too many gratuitous Arnold grunts and irrelevant alcoholism references 1 stars
6/01/00 Jimmy Could have ben better, but it was still pretty good. 4 stars
5/23/00 Monday Morning $50 mil for EFX, not a farthing for original thinking. 2 stars
5/21/00 mellemel Bad. Really Bad. 1 stars
5/19/00 Steve A great performance by Byrne, an entertaining flick 4 stars
5/15/00 Chrissy T Why does Gabriel never live to see daylight.He's the Devil.Let the man get some for once. 2 stars
5/03/00 matt entertaining movie, but not awesome, however extremely entertaining 4 stars
4/26/00 Leo Chef ADogg is right this is by no means a great movie but an entertaining one 4 stars
4/23/00 The Bomb 69 surprisingly enjoyable 4 stars
4/18/00 foxgroundcolt "easy with the hardware!!!" 4 stars
4/10/00 Bruce Not one of Arnold's great movies, but it was decent 4 stars
3/15/00 Lame-Oh GO SEE THE NINTH GATE 1 stars
3/10/00 movieman has it's highs and lows, but overall it was entertaining 4 stars
3/06/00 Captain Highcrime Hilarious to hear Arnie butcher the phrase "Glock Nine Millimeter." 3 stars
2/11/00 James Woodman Good solid return for arnie 4 stars
2/09/00 Ed Wood very enjoyable 5 stars
1/19/00 k.tomkowski Poor script. Arnie proves he cannot act. Byrnes is very good. 3 stars
1/17/00 Dirk Diggler i enjoyed it 5 stars
1/15/00 Marli I can't say anything about this movie 3 stars
1/13/00 henry hill I enjoyed this film 5 stars
1/13/00 heroinchic Come on Arnie! Back to basics. Stop playing the Goodies. Your boring unless bad 2 stars
1/13/00 master this is a good film 5 stars
1/12/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/12/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/12/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/12/00 dr.d underated 5 stars
1/10/00 Aiken Drum Its Arnie saving the world, what a guy. 3 stars
1/05/00 Joel Harwood Freaky 5 stars
1/05/00 Ian Rivlin Pathetic claptrap 1 stars
12/24/99 Stu Shoot me, shoot me now, please. 2 stars
12/23/99 Wafer I've never seen a worse movie & every fight scene was filled w/ excessive schwarzen-grunts 1 stars
12/23/99 Matrinka Oh god... I'd rather let Satan win than watch this movie again. 1 stars
12/19/99 Mr Showbiz Simply put... shite. 1 stars
12/17/99 Lame-Oh this was campier and stupider than the ad. Lies, lies, LIES! 1 stars
12/12/99 Obi Wan The Devil is the shit, Gabriel Rocked it!! Bruce Willis should have played Jericho 3 stars
12/09/99 Sher worst movie in the world..priests are so pathetic that they allowed Arnold to fight satan.. 1 stars
12/08/99 JonnyAngel Even after all the bad reviews, I relly thought I'd like it, but... 2 stars
12/08/99 majawat um, not good. Not good at all. But not painful at least. 2 stars
12/07/99 Cheryl Man, people TOLD me not to see this piece of shit and I didn't listen... 1 stars
12/06/99 Ami the wonderbread I just don't buy Jericho's "strength" at the end to defeat Satan. Whatever. 1 stars
12/06/99 Amy Lamest script I've ever heard, but Gabriel Byrne was good. At least it wasn't boring. 3 stars
12/05/99 Wojtek Arciszewski Reminded me of British cooking... some interesting moments... but over all a bland meal 2 stars
12/04/99 joe chip Its amazing what you'll agree to when you're on fire 2 stars
12/04/99 russ johnson THIS MOVIE SUCKED MAJOR ASS.....ARNOLD IT IS TIME TO RETIRE 1 stars
12/03/99 Kevin Way Cheesy. Boring. If you must see it, catch it on cable in about... two weeks. 1 stars
12/02/99 Carlos G. Lamas A Terrible Waste of Film and Time 1 stars
12/02/99 Roman A damn fun time 5 stars
11/30/99 Vaughn Allen Let's not get hung up on being cynical- this movie was fun as hell 5 stars
11/30/99 MickCollins The biggest piece of shit since "Spawn" 1 stars
11/30/99 Ryan Phillipe got hit by a car and it rules This movie was so brilliant. It truly moved me in ways a movie has never moved me before. 1 stars
11/29/99 George Nedelchev Good one-liners are not enough. Disappointing comeback for Arnie. 2 stars
11/28/99 Chet Patel this was one huge P.O.S. Arnie has gotten very desperate for a film. 1 stars
11/27/99 The King of the Bros I just liked it when that old lady kicked Arnold's ass. 3 stars
11/26/99 CATM The ending gave it a higher rating, but could've been better.Too gorey 3 stars
11/26/99 Lame-Oh could have been better 3 stars
11/25/99 Thomas Aquinas...man, that wasn't even original in the movie... Byrne was fun to watch, & Arnold's old reliable, but there's an excess of jokeyness 4 stars
11/24/99 Ramsay With less action and a real actor, it might have been interesting 3 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  24-Nov-1999 (R)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  26-Dec-1999




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