More in-depth film festival coverage than any other website!
Home Reviews  Articles  Release Dates Coming Soon  DVD  Top 20s Criticwatch  Search
Public Forums  Festival Coverage  Contests About 

Overall Rating

Awesome: 0%
Worth A Look: 0%
Average: 0%
Pretty Bad: 0%
Total Crap100%

1 review, 1 rating

Latest Reviews

Destiny: The Tale of Kamakura by Jay Seaver

Buffalo Boys by Jay Seaver

Mandy by Rob Gonsalves

Road Not Taken, The by Jay Seaver

Great Battle, The by Jay Seaver

True Fiction by Jay Seaver

Pick of the Litter by Jay Seaver

Fahrenheit 11/9 by Peter Sobczynski

House With A Clock In Its Walls, The by Peter Sobczynski

Life Itself (2018) by Peter Sobczynski

subscribe to this feed

Animal Instincts- The Seductress
[] Buy posters from this movie
by Charles Tatum

"Animal In-STINKS (giggle)"
1 stars

Only in direct-to-video softcore porn could stupid films like this exist.

Joanna (Wendy Schumacher) is a world renowned best selling author/sex expert. She is very famous, but still finds time to entertain the little people by having sex in public places with total strangers thanks to her chronic exhibitionism. She meets Alex (James Matthew), the world renowned blind record producer/knife thrower. Don't you see the irony? An exhibitionist is dating a blind man! Don't the possibilities stun you?

I am not giving anything away here, but Alex's blindness is as real as Paris Hilton's sex appeal. He is faking and playing mind games with Joanna because...well, I don't know why and you won't care. Making Alex's character a record producer means Joanna gets to bed a bunch of musician stereotypes right in front of Alex, never questioning his poorly played infirmity.

Gregory Dark, renowned porn creator, Britney Spears' former music video director, and one of the sleaziest looking creatures on the planet, brings little visual flair to the stupid script. The screenwriter tries to say something about the state of relationships, but his thought provoking lines are delivered by actors who wouldn't get a callback for a kindergarten pageant about fighting tooth decay.

"Animal Instincts- The Seductress" also lacks the sexy Shannon Whirry of the first two "Animal Instincts" films, replacing her with a pouty Schumacher. Schumacher looks too much like a bitchy coworker of mine to elicit any other feeling that contempt.

Slight film, slight review, unless dry humping and lousy music are your thing: in that case, just rewatch your prom night video (ohh, burn...)!

link directly to this review at
originally posted: 01/04/07 07:40:13
[printer] printer-friendly format  

User Comments

10/01/06 Charles Tatum Without Whirry, this slice of hell is awful 1 stars
Note: Duplicate, 'planted,' or other obviously improper comments
will be deleted at our discretion. So don't bother posting 'em. Thanks!
Your Name:
Your Comments:
Your Location: (state/province/country)
Your Rating:

Discuss this movie in our forum

  06-Jan-1996 (R)

  06-Mar-1996 (18)


Directed by
  Gregory Dark

Written by
  Selwyn Harris

  Wendy Schumacher
  James Matthew
  Marcus Grahm
  John Bates
  Anthony Lesa

Home Reviews  Articles  Release Dates Coming Soon  DVD  Top 20s Criticwatch  Search
Public Forums  Festival Coverage  Contests About Australia's Largest Movie Review Database.
Privacy Policy | HBS Inc. | |   

All data and site design copyright 1997-2017, HBS Entertainment, Inc.
Search for
reviews features movie title writer/director/cast