"'Everybody loves Seagal' should be the fucking title!!!"
To tell you the truth, I was a Steven Seagal fan when I was just a kid; I liked him because of his martial arts and stuff. Of course, since I was a simple brat, which meant that I liked all of his movies that he released. But guess what, I've got bigger........ And I started to despise some movies that Seagal made. Like this piece of shit that I'm bothering to review. Ok, good old Seagal as Mason Storm films a meeting with some evil aide -who wants to be senator- and a hit man. They want to bump off the map a senator thatís blocking the evil aideís path. Seagal is almost discovered, and he runs away with the snuff film. But then the bad guys go and kill him and his family. First of all, how the fuck did they know it was Storm filming it? The film never tells us how they find out that Storm is the guy that was spying them. But alas, heís not dead, heís in a coma and lays there for 7 years, when thank to a beautiful nurse, he regains his strength, and in the beginning almost has him killed. So he goes and plots revenge.
Fuck, that was tiresome to write,
The script is filled with more plotholes than your average Chinese condom; itís laughable in many aspects, and never believable. Sure there was some nastiness as how he and his family get wiped out. That, and the liquor store fight, well, at least those two were fun to watch, but other than that, the rest of the setting is just for laughs. Then comes the killing bore.
Moving on, uh... fuck it, I don't want to move along. Why? Because the film after the opening scenes and the liquor store fight, it gets SSSSSOOOOOOOOOO boring! Believe me, this film was the worst Iíve ever seen from Seagal. I never thought it would be like this. Itís not even an Action flick or a Drama flick since it fails at both. The acting is lame (well what can you expect from Seagal), and the script is basically dull, stupid and drags the entire film. I just wish that Seagal would choose better movies than this trash, or not act at all.In the end, please don't even try and watch this flick, even if you're a Seagal fan, you'll end up all pissed off like me. Maybe worse.