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Now, this legendary filmmaker has graced the world with hundreds of enjoyable B-movie chestnuts but it's clear his New Concorde Home Video outfit is more interested in lazy paydays than in producing worthwhile cheese.

Ice Crawlers (a.k.a. Deep Freeze) is a whole lot like John Carpenter's The Thing - minus the craftsmanship, the artistry and the talent.

Here a group of grad students visit an Antarctic outpost and get systematically chomped by a creature that looks a whole lot like an overturned bowl of dark green lettuce. With one tenatacle.

To say much more would imply that there IS much more - and that's simply not the case. The acting, dialogue and special effects are precisely the sort you'd expect to find in a 20-year-late ripoff from the Corman camp. Quite literally nothing happens for the first hour and when the bodies DO start piling up, the payoffs are distressingly tame, though 'inept' may be a better word.

As an admitted horror freak who can find something enjoyable in even the lousiest of scare stories, trust me when I say this one's worthless. To call a film 'one of director J.C. Beuchler's least professional efforts' is to tell you all you need know about the quality of Ice Crawlers.

In other words, it's just plain awful.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=9535&reviewer=128
originally posted: 05/01/04 22:43:32
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