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Whoever found this abysmal old slasher flick rotting in their garage saw some quick dollar signs. Vestron Video and the fine film folks over at Troma both gave this movie a video release, and heck: now Artisan Home Video deems it worthy of a DVD release. Oddly enough, their packaging doesn’t mention Costner ONCE! Are they somehow under the impression that this is a GOOD horror movie?

Puh-leeze.

Looking like a cross between TV's Mannix and your grandfather’s 8mm ‘day at the beach’ videos from 1975, Shadows Run Black is absolutely a terrible film. Terrible as in "DO NOT waste your time". Unless you’re directly related to someone in the cast, I cannot imagine one reason you’d make it through the first 45 seconds.

Plot? Odd-numbered scenes feature a slasher killing girls. Even-numbered scenes are comprised of a horribly bad police procedural. Mush ‘em together, watch ‘em, and I guarantee you start wondering who okays what movies get released over at Artisan Entertainment’s ‘crappy movie’ department.

Oh yeah. There are several naked breasts in this one; a testament to how convincing an attractive woman's next-door neighbor can be when armed only with a camcorder.

The end credits come courtesy of a VIC-20 computer. I’m dead serious.

link directly to this review at http://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=9566&reviewer=128
originally posted: 05/03/04 19:59:33
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