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Overall Rating

Awesome: 7.35%
Worth A Look: 9.56%
Pretty Bad: 30.88%
Total Crap: 11.76%

11 reviews, 70 user ratings

Blade: Trinity
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by EricDSnider

"Pretty funny for an action movie. Too bad Blade himself is so boring."
3 stars

I'm reasonably fond of the sort of movies that the "Blade" films are, and yet when I saw "Blade II" I had no memory of "Blade I," and when I sat down to watch "Blade III" (titled, for no reason, "Blade Trinity"), I realized I had no memory of "Blade II," either. I recall only a lot of thick mythology, confusing action scenes, and barrels upon barrels of blood. In terms of specifics such as plots or characters, I am lost. So I am hurrying to write my review of "Blade Trinity" as fast as I can, before it slips out of my mind forever and even my scribbled notes become useless.

Blade, played again with over-much coolness by one-time celebrity Wesley Snipes, is a human-vampire hybrid who has devoted his life and his considerable array of weapons to the destruction of his nocturnal half-cousins. He is aided by Whistler (Kris Kristofferson), a scraggly old coot with a knack for technology; in the new film, they are joined by Whistler's long-lost daughter Abigail (Jessica Biel) and a man named Hannibal King (Ryan Reynolds), who spent five years being a vampire before being rescued by a serum that turned him human again.

King has a personal reason for fighting vampires. That reason, as it is with so many men who want to fight vampires, is that his ex-girlfriend is one. She is Danica Talos (Parker Posey), and it was she who converted him in the first place. It is also she who has reawakened the world's first vampire -- Dagon, Dracula, whatever you want to call him -- to help the vampires wage war against Blade.

The "Blade" films are based on a dark comic book series and have been written by David S. Goyer, who also directed this third film. As such, there is a certain consistency in tone, the ongoing presence of vulgar wisecracks, the abundant violence. "Blade Trinity" is Goyer's first major stab at directing, and he does seem to have an eye for decent action sequences.

But the first half of the film is bogged down by Snipes' dull performance as Blade, a character who seems less interesting the more time we spend with him. Parker Posey gets some campy laughs as the evil, Ivana Trump-esque Danica, but I think she goes over the top, a tendency to which Posey is not normally prone, but oh well. The one who gets it exactly right is Ryan Reynolds, whose Hannibal King character is viciously, snarkily funny, oozing the same wise-acre attitude of a thousand other action-flick supporting characters but doing it much better. Part of it is that his dialogue is written well -- I wish I could tell you the funniest thing he says, but it's so crass I don't even want to THINK it -- but part of it is also his smart-aleck delivery. I said in my review of "National Lampoon's Van Wilder," in which he starred, that if he ever got some good material, he'd probably be really funny. And here we are. I do so enjoy being right.

"Blade Trinity" is not a comedy, but its funny parts are more memorable than its action-horror parts, which are competent but unremarkable. I cannot tell what fans of the series will think, because as I mentioned, I am not a very good fan myself. Most of the film has drained from my memory already, as if sucked out by some fanged, malevolent force.

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originally posted: 12/08/04 19:25:27
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User Comments

2/21/17 morris campbell pretty good nothing more 3 stars
7/23/08 JM Synth Lame; Biel and especially Reynolds don't help matters 2 stars
6/22/08 David V This trilogy went from badass to just bad. 1 stars
4/15/08 Andrew I was very dissappointed in the ending of this shit. Blade didn't make it! He died. 1 stars
3/02/08 John Millheim very cool, the best Blade out there 5 stars
7/14/07 MaDmAN All big bad "Drake" could do was threaten babies and little girls weak movie all around 3 stars
6/08/07 pete pretty good, enjoyed the comedy and action, but could have been alot better 3 stars
4/12/07 rimrhino Liked Reynolds, hated Purcell, Snipes still kicks ass, but it's time kill the series. 4 stars
1/31/07 William Boyle Boring and witless. A video game pretending to be a film. 1 stars
1/21/07 del The absolute bottom-of-the-barrel worst of the three...and that's saying something. 1 stars
9/28/06 Los Angeles Free Home Insurance plan Home L0ans 4 stars
9/03/06 Dragon The Artist Ditch the "scientfic" aspects,political correctness, & that campy depiction of Dracula.CRAP 1 stars
8/02/06 dan a disapointing end to what could have been a great trilogy 1 stars
7/03/06 Jim National Lampoon's Van Wilder: Vampire Hunter. Better than X3 anyway. 4 stars
4/06/06 Troy M. Grzych This movie lacks all of the fine craftmanship of "Blade 2" 3 stars
4/01/06 Michele these movies are always fun 4 stars
3/31/06 Soha Molina great movie 5 stars
3/29/06 Josh Standlee I am a true believer that Wesley Snipes is a god! Dracula was scary as fuck! 5 stars
3/28/06 Danny Johanson This movie has some great one liners, the plot may suck, but hell, its a good mindless fun 3 stars
2/27/06 Steven Lewis Worst of all three films but "decent" action. 2 stars
2/21/06 Steve Newman Blade 1 and 2 were excellent - this was crap 2 stars
2/03/06 van zwaar entertaining budget film wasnt expectin much so wasnt dissapointed(cockjugglin.....) LOL 4 stars
11/07/05 rob amazin flm wish more were being made 5 stars
10/21/05 jamie i love this movie so stop trashing it :P 5 stars
9/13/05 drippy 'Saw this last night...easily the worst of the series...and that's saying something!!!!!!!! 1 stars
9/01/05 ES It was alright, fun and violent & now we have the premise of Blade as the bad guy in #4 4 stars
8/30/05 Brisbane "2" was the only one worth watching...long live DEL TORO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1 stars
8/18/05 Maalstrom The series just gets worse, retire the franchise already 2 stars
8/09/05 Maalstrom Was lacking in both story and action. Unispired. 3 stars
7/09/05 Moctezuma Seriously disappointing 2 stars
6/28/05 The Talking Elbow WHY DID YOU DO THE MATRIX HAND-TAUNT!!!!!!!!!! 1 stars
6/25/05 Mr Fluffy Man. AvP is just looking better and better 1 stars
6/21/05 the dude "epic" peice of fucken crap, it sucks like vamp balls. let's down 1&2 1 stars
6/10/05 Naka Snipes is on his way out. And thank god. 1 stars
5/28/05 Indrid Cold Just as good as the first two: lame plot, good action, Snipes is badass. 3 stars
5/27/05 angela hicks i think that the Blade: Trinity movie was even more awesome than the other Blade movies. 5 stars
5/24/05 tatum Snipes doesn't even give the flick a chance; what a jerk 2 stars
4/30/05 Heather Tarlecky This movie was the greatest 4 stars
4/20/05 Krisan just an example of how sequals just arent as good as the originals 3 stars
4/17/05 Sharon Davis Nothing special 3 stars
4/15/05 shatonjia They should have stopped after the first Blade. 2 stars
4/13/05 Junior LaRoche Heard it sucks, but was really surprised with it. Not as good as the other ones tho. 3 stars
3/31/05 Blade: great, Blade 2: Fantastic, Blade Trinity: Decent, but not great Joseph 3 stars
3/26/05 Denise good 3 stars
2/04/05 Mikolai Should be titled "Dracula: The Gay Blade" 2 stars
1/17/05 Roy Smith Again Does what sunlight, garlic, and holy water could not do... 2 stars
1/08/05 Al Guy They even ruined Blade. Sad. Fighting with an MP3 on. Stupid. 2 stars
12/28/04 Archanist_101 Not as GOOD as the first two films... The fight scenes + Jessica Beil were worth it!!!!!!!! 3 stars
12/26/04 Maurice EVO decent movie, nice special effect, and a nice babe 4 stars
12/23/04 mike schaeffer Snipes wants to sue New York. Movie-goers ought to sue him. 1 stars
12/22/04 Kay forget Blade, I want to see a Hannibel King movie 4 stars
12/18/04 ENTS The second one's better. Am really disppointed.with this one. 2 stars
12/13/04 KayCe Whitacre Don't like Comic Book movies? DON'T GO! Best BLADE ever! IT ROX! 5 stars
12/13/04 BrianWilly Watch it for the humor and senseless violence, not for...well, logic. 3 stars
12/13/04 Koitus The rating is "generous." Great fight scenes, but nothing really new; similar ending 2 #1 3 stars
12/13/04 Andy its awesome i dont believe anyone could give it a smaller rating than awesome 5 stars
12/12/04 Aren Decent Film, weakest of the 3. Still v/ entertaining though 4 stars
12/11/04 KingNeutron Nice debut for Paul Levesque; the dog was truly a nice touch for his char. 4 stars
12/11/04 Jerry Easily the worst film of the trilogy. Silly dialouge, poor characters, and very unoriginal 2 stars
12/11/04 Me the best one 5 stars
12/11/04 othree kinda weak Blade stilla solid some of casts' acting was eh lite storyline, good begining 3 stars
12/11/04 Captain Highcrime Holy Cow!! Two members of The New Main Street Singers are vampires?! Didn't see that coming 3 stars
12/10/04 luke good movie best of the three 5 stars
12/10/04 Hyoun Lim it was an average movie 3 stars
12/09/04 Gray fun 4 stars
12/09/04 Juan SUCKED!!!!!! 1 stars
12/09/04 walter save your money! , it seemed like a low budget film id see on sunday afternoon noncable tv 1 stars
12/09/04 Kristina Williams It could have been worse. Imagine Stifler instead of Van Wilder in this. Ugh. 3 stars
12/08/04 Whoop Whoop Enjoyable fun. 4 stars
12/08/04 Ray Just bad 1 stars
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  08-Dec-2004 (R)
  DVD: 26-Apr-2005



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