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Overall Rating

Awesome: 3.45%
Worth A Look: 3.45%
Average: 3.45%
Pretty Bad: 17.24%
Total Crap72.41%

5 reviews, 28 user ratings

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Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
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by brianorndorf

"Six years for this?"
1 stars

Rob Schneider has hit an all-time career low with “European Gigolo,” the disastrous sequel to his mildly diverting 1999 hit comedy. Taking the action to Amsterdam, Schneider feels the need to beat the material into an ugly, racist, homophobic pulp, peppered with some the lamest gross-out jokes seen to date. What was once a passably funny character and actor has become the Osama Bin Laden of 2005 summer comedies.

After losing his wife to a shark attack, Deuce Bigalow (Rob Schneider) takes up an offer from his old pimp T.J. (Eddie Griffin) to visit him in Amsterdam for the annual “Man-Whore Awards.” Upon arrival, Deuce learns that a shadowy figure with rare lipstick is killing off all the gigolos, framing T.J. in the process. Forced to go back to the world’s oldest profession to investigate the crimes, Deuce finds help and love in a sweet native (Hanna Verboom) with a scorching case of OCD.

Some time back, Rob Schneider threw a tantrum when the Walt Disney Corporation refused to finance a sequel to the sleeper hit, “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo.” Deemed too racy for the Mouse House, Schneider took the film to Sony to move the project ahead. Six years later (!), Schneider has returned to serve up more Deuce to a national viewing audience that didn’t ask for second helpings.

It was the best business and artistic decision Disney has ever made.

I’ve been giving Schneider the benefit of the doubt for some time now, and I will go to my grave believing that his last starring role, in 2002’s “The Hot Chick,” was a terrific send-up of the Britney Spears generation. However, the love stops here. “European Gigolo” is Schneider’s worst film to date, needlessly furthering this franchise from charming strikeout to flat-out repulsion. The film represents Schneider on an absolute tear, with the actor trying frantically to surpass the simple R-rated appeal of the original film and any other “adult” comedies that dare go for the crown this summer. Outside of a good crack about Mexican beach resort safety, and the obligatory (and welcome) Adam Sandler cameo, this sequel is the absolute pits.

Receiving the unfortunate assignment of making his directorial debut with “European Gigolo” is Mike Bigalow. There’s only so much blame that can be assigned to Bigalow since this is Schneider’s baby, though it must be noted that, technically speaking, the film is an incredibly sloppy creation. The timing is way off in many of the larger comedic moments, and Bigelow needs a refresher course on the proper use of music cues and cutaways before he makes another film.

The remainder of this nightmare belongs solely to Schneider (who also scripts), who gets a huge kick out of repeating gags from “Male Gigolo,” and trying to top himself in the sight gag department for the new film. “European Gigolo” runs through the familiar montage of Deuce’s dates, including a young woman with a tracheotomy hole, which leads to sorry attempts at physical humor in a dinner sequence. And there’s the film’s lowest point: a woman with male genitalia for her nose (she’s a former resident of Chernobyl). I bet you can’t guess what happens when she sneezes. I’ll let that sink in for a moment.

Throw in Eddie Griffin’s amazing cinematic world record attempt at not being responsible for a single laugh during his entire career, rather substantial and mean-spirited racial humor, and a liberal dose of homophobia, and this is what Schneider wants to share with the world. Ouch.

As the film plows through endless sexual wordplay games (sex metaphors like “Turkish Snow-Cone“ and “Filthy Ramirez” are beaten into the ground), clichéd Amsterdam hijinks, and scarily unfunny “prosti-dude” situations, the feeling that Schneider was swinging too hard for the fences comes to mind immediately.

Schneider has proven repeatedly that nothing is going to kill his career, but if the case ever goes to trial, “European Gigolo” should put him away for life.

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originally posted: 08/12/05 14:02:11
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User Comments

2/20/11 Ark If this movie was a turd, it would be the same thing! 1 stars
10/22/07 Beau What is worng with you people, this is bloddy funny! deuce biggest lady ive ever seen 4 stars
7/26/07 parasvati this movie actually made me physically ill. 1 stars
5/08/07 Charles Tatum One of the worst fucking experiences of my life 1 stars
10/28/06 Chantelle White Here's an idea... don't watch comedy if you're an arsehole. 5 stars
4/02/06 JRE worst movie ever made 1 stars
3/31/06 Anthony Feor Was this really needed? 1 stars
2/24/06 ES Gross and I figured out who the bad guy was in the first half-hour, so no surprises 2 stars
12/22/05 Ethan M. I chuckled... ONCE! 2 stars
12/19/05 Jesse Radin Rob Schenider has a punchable face, when you see it you want to punch it! This sucked. 1 stars
12/08/05 Sean D Pure undiluted fucking toilet humor shit. Oh and £15? Do me a fucking favour! 1 stars
12/01/05 MrsVoorheesBabyBoy A Crappy Sequel to a Crappy Movie 1 stars
11/30/05 Robert Quinn if you saw this knowing what the first was like, just blame yourself, not the movie. 1 stars
10/26/05 AndyWarholiday I'd say it was shit, but why insult shit? 1 stars
10/22/05 Ava Rice Uneven but hilarious when Eva scares Deuce with garotte when she's only gonna cut cheese! 3 stars
10/05/05 Priscilla Postlethwaite Most gags not carried through to their potential; not as good as first Deuce Bigelow movie. 4 stars
10/01/05 Green Gremlin Even worse than "Freddy got Fingered" !!! 1 stars
9/19/05 Jonathon Holmes 75 minuntes of my life i'll never get back 1 stars
9/14/05 TuRp C'mon, it's not all bad. Funnier than the original. Toilet humor, stupid fun. 3 stars
9/08/05 mark day great movie, laughed the whole time 5 stars
9/01/05 Mojo Bad movie but Norm Macdonald stole the movie -- Give him a movie 1 stars
8/28/05 bizenya stupid. not GOOD stupid, but REALLY BAD stupid. 1 stars
8/21/05 Duffyboy666 In 2003 it was Gigli. In 2004 it was Catwoman. This is Hollywoods prize dreck 2005. Cunts! 1 stars
8/20/05 buford gay 1 stars
8/17/05 James This movie stinks BIGTIME! 1 stars
8/14/05 Dixie Theriault if possible even more juvenile than the first one. 2 stars
8/13/05 ajay a laughed a few times, but overall it was dumb 2 stars
8/13/05 nads my god, this movie sucked. 1 stars
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  12-Aug-2005 (R)
  DVD: 29-Nov-2005



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