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Overall Rating

Awesome: 6.98%
Worth A Look: 3.49%
Average: 8.14%
Pretty Bad: 17.44%
Total Crap63.95%

6 reviews, 50 user ratings

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Date Movie
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by brianorndorf

"It's worse than 'BloodRayne'"
1 stars

As if the parody genre is already sketchy enough in terms of artistic integrity, “Date Movie” is another reminder that not everyone with a camera and a half-assed screenplay can make one of these films click. It goes without saying that this crude, desperate comedy goes for long stretches without laughs. But the film tries hard to be hilarious, revealing the filmmakers are unable to achieve even the simplest of goals.

Let’s face it, spoofs are easy to make. You don’t have to be a very talented filmmaker to throw together a series of scenes that poke fun at more successful movies. Where once the ZAZ teamed ruled the genre in the 1980s with their thoughtfully planned out and agreeably goofy films (“Airplane!”), talent like the Wayans Brothers are now the barometer for satirical success. This might explain why “Date Movie” is such a scattershot and ultimately deplorable comedy, and a thoroughly uninspired parody.

It’s just February, and we’ve already found a film worse than “BloodRayne.” I didn’t think it would happen that fast, but here we are.

The goal of “Date Movie” is to send up romantic comedies, centered on our protagonist, Julie Jones (Alyson Hannigan), a young woman who lives a very “Bridget Jones’s Diary” existence. Looking for love, Julie asks for help from Lil’ Hitch (Tony Cox), who assists in pimping her out from the control of her Greek family (including Eddie Griffin), and pushes her into the arms of Grant Fonckyerdoder (Adam Campbell). The two fall in love and are soon to be wed, but not if Grant’s former fiancée (a stunning Sophie Monk) has anything to say about it.

“Date Movie” comes from the minds of Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, who have both made an entire career out of writing parody screenplays (“Scary Movie,” “Spy Hard”). “Date Movie” marks their directorial debut, and I can’t imagine a worse way to start off a film career than with this continuously atrocious comedy. This is a film that doesn’t aim high to begin with, stuffed to the gills with enough flatulence, sex, and random body defect humor that you might think the filmmakers never made it past junior high in their critical funny bone development. Sadly, these gentlemen are in their 30s, and nothing pleases them more than to watch a puppet cat straining on a toilet, Hannigan running around in a fat suit (a tired concept way past its expiration date), Eddie Griffin regurgitating chest hair he’s swallowed, or Carmen Electra being felt up by a giant ape finger. Laughing yet?

The “Date Movie” targets for lampoon are all over the map. One minute the film is sending up the orgasm scene from “When Harry Met Sally” (take that 1989!), the next “Mr. & Mrs. Smith” is being raked over the coals. Burning through “The Wedding Planner” (the Jennifer Lopez look-alike has a giant behind), “Meet the Fockers” (Jennifer Coolidge and Fred Willard co-star), and “My Best Friend’s Wedding” for inspiration, the filmmaking duo start to get desperate, squeezing in awkward digs at “Napoleon Dynamite” (you see, his shirt reads “Don’t Vote for Pedro”), “Kill Bill,” and “Revenge of the Sith” just keep the audience awake. Television isn’t spared either, with “The Bachelor” and “Pimp My Ride” satires included for those in the audience who don’t make time for movies.

“Date Movie” is one missed gag after another. And when the filmmakers start to desperately call out their parodies, as they do when a “What Women Want” moment hits the screen, any good will towards the film is destroyed.

This is appallingly bad cinema, made without imagination, and counting on audience indifference to succeed.

link directly to this review at
originally posted: 02/17/06 19:41:35
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User Comments

9/21/20 Bronwyn Blanchard Pretty lame but far less offensive that those hell-bent on re-educating us int hating it. 3 stars
2/17/10 JM Synth Painfully unfunny, but not as abysmally cheap/lazy as future Friedberg/Seltzer efforts 2 stars
2/16/09 Samantha Pruitt pretty stupid, but still some what funny! 3 stars
1/15/09 FrankNFurter As funny as watching puppies drown.Total waste of film!!! 1 stars
1/08/09 Shaun Wallner Hilarious Movie! 5 stars
8/30/08 David The movie's funny if your brain-dead. 1 stars
6/06/08 Randy War Hall This Movie made my ears sad. 1 stars
4/05/08 art IT"S FUNNY IF YOU KEEP AN OPEN MIND 4 stars
3/25/08 Isaac M. Baranoff One of the most awful films I've ever attempted to sit through. 1 stars
3/08/08 ftard These directors make tailor made amusement for trailer/white trash films. 1 stars
3/02/08 John Millheim pretty funny 4 stars
7/09/07 fools♫gold Wow, this and Final Destination 3 came out in the same month. Now wasn't that a funny line? 1 stars
5/23/07 Abs Dumbest movie ever. Nothing to enjoy at all here. 1 stars
5/15/07 David Pollastrini PRETTY DUMB 2 stars
4/03/07 brent gerald mejia sr. Eddie Griffin stars;ENOUGH said! 1 stars
2/22/07 Beau i love the openeing song and dance 'Hannigan' does, its worth watching it 4 her 3 stars
1/18/07 del Quite possibly one of the worst movies ever made. 1 stars
12/22/06 ES note the writers and avoid everything they do in the future 1 stars
11/07/06 wesley sniper Dude, Lakehurst is one word. We still love ya! The movie sucked ass. 1 stars
10/31/06 Jacko wacko Poorly classified but okay 3 stars
10/31/06 Chris I worked at Taco Bell so Taco was was just funny 5 stars
10/25/06 Drew G I almost made it 15 minutes into this movie 1 stars
10/24/06 Phil LOL @ Jon (below) 1 stars
10/03/06 Jon Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. Horrible movie. Why can't I give it zero stars? 1 stars
8/26/06 Stanley Thai An underrated film that is taken so seriously. People, just relax and enjoy the film! 3 stars
8/18/06 Nix So funny I shit myself 5 stars
8/17/06 Harold I am completely without words...I really am. STAGGERINGLY bad...staggeringly... 1 stars
8/11/06 michael has a couple moments but not woth paying for 3 stars
8/06/06 Indrid Cold The upside is that aside from the ending credits, it's only a little over an hour long. 2 stars
8/02/06 dan quite funny,worth a look 3 stars
7/21/06 Joe Smaltz Sucks SucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucksSucks 1 stars
6/12/06 Jeff Anderson Unfunny junk & DOA. Hannigan & ONLY Hannigan is the lone great thing in this! 1 stars
6/11/06 Ryan_A I laughed. A lot. But I felt bad about it afterwards. Not as funny as it thinks it is. 2 stars
6/10/06 The Thomas Family My family thought this movie was awesome! It kept us laughing. 5 stars
4/18/06 Erika Clarkson Way too lame - no real nudity, scatlolgical humor restricted to cat, no farting girls. Darn 4 stars
4/14/06 Duffyboy666 How can these bastards live with themselves? 1 stars
4/08/06 Astrocreep Sooo damn funny. Great Napolean impression 5 stars
3/30/06 Rhiannon This film rocks!! 5 stars
3/13/06 date movie sucks crap movie 1 stars
3/11/06 Dillon None of the scenes have real endings. I laughed a little, but not enough. 2 stars
3/05/06 jeff s. openning dance was good, thats about it.sad how they let it b released 1 stars
3/05/06 chris f this film is a let down they take the piss out of michael jackson -tats just wrong 2 stars
3/04/06 Green Gremlin How dare they insult "Napoleon Dynamite" with this hideous crap !!! 1 stars
3/03/06 Mungface Someone told me this was "freaking hilarious"...I killed them. 1 stars
2/22/06 djacosta Utterly disgusting 1 stars
2/20/06 M The cat is the only thing that remotely made me laugh. 1 stars
2/18/06 Eevil Wolfie Opening dance sequence is good. Everything else is crap. 2 stars
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  17-Feb-2006 (PG-13)
  DVD: 30-May-2006



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