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Overall Rating

Awesome: 7.81%
Worth A Look: 3.13%
Average: 3.13%
Pretty Bad: 3.13%
Total Crap82.81%

4 reviews, 40 user ratings

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Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector
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by brianorndorf

"Between this and 'Stay Alive,' I guess it's back to books for me"
1 stars

“Health Inspector” is comedian Larry the Cable Guy’s starring debut, and it’s the kind of film that will make you question why people find redneck humor so endearing, or at the very least, how appalling comedians con their audience. “Inspector” is utter garbage, giving big, stupid comedies a bad name in its journey to be most criminally awful and visually shameful film of the year.

For those playing at home: about 85 minutes. That’s how long it takes to hear the first and last “Git-R-Done.” And it’s not even smuggled in with the rest of the dialogue, but announced loudly to the 4th wall at the very end, as if it was the reward for having to sit through this rotten, excruciating mess of a film.

In the first five minutes of the redneck comedian’s film debut, we see Larry urinating on himself in the shower, flashing his butt crack, having a flatulence attack in front of his boss, and referencing the smell of “strawberry douche.” At this point I turn to America and ask: why? Why Larry the Cable Guy? We had something sweeter and slightly funnier in the Jim Varney character Ernest years back, but that franchise was quickly ignored by audiences. This must be the cinematic gods making us all pay for our sins.

There’s a plot to “Health Inspector,” involving dim-witted and grotesque Larry and his butch partner Amy (Iris Bahr) trying to crack a ring of deliberate food poisonings the week before a local cooking competition. But if it’s a plot you’re after, then “Health Inspector” has not done its job properly. Directing novice (and I hope it stays that way) Trent Cooper is only there to keep the movie in focus (he even fails that at times) and to make certain there are enough fart jokes to keep the overlong running time rumbling. Seriously, you could make DVD chapters out of the number of times Larry -- or anybody, really -- makes with the southern thunder. It culminates in a sequence where Larry fights a diarrhea attack in his love interest’s bathroom that, and I can’t believe I’m writing this, is stolen from a better, extraordinarily more clever film (“Dumb & Dumber”).

That’s how awful this picture is. It can’t even come up with new diarrhea jokes.

When stand-up comics get big screen work, it usually implies that they will be replicating their act for the cameras, playing to the already converted for a quick buck. Not being all that familiar with Mr. the Cable Guy’s material, I seriously weep for anyone who finds this stunningly one-note performer funny. And this is coming from a person who thinks “Pootie Tang” is the bee’s knees.

I respect that comedy is subjective, but the depths of awful this film sinks to are eye-opening. Making fun of the physically challenged? Jerry Mathers as the “big” cameo of the film? Scenes of mass vomiting? Enough Hooters product placement to swear off chicken wings for life? These are not the ingredients of a good dumb comedy. This, my friends, is the combination to the lock on the gates of hell.

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originally posted: 03/25/06 18:11:49
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User Comments

1/12/11 Matt Stilwell This movie is hilarious. A perfect comedy 5 stars
10/18/09 Samantha I'd rather go fuck my mother than watch this again. 1 stars
4/25/08 Karrie Millheim The movie was a little cheesy 2 stars
8/18/07 bronson just what i'd expect from this redneck clown. as low as it gets. a pathetic PIG ! 1 stars
7/29/07 Kelse I laughed nearly as much as that time I got ass-rapped by a sheep. 1 stars
5/23/07 Anti-Tristin You retard, you meant "good movie." What, Larry has another retard for a groupie? Amazing 1 stars
5/12/07 Tristin I thought is was a god movie, GIT-R-DONE 5 stars
3/01/07 THE REAL DEAL The only correct review Cornelius has ever made 1 stars
1/07/07 Frank Rountree "That's funny I don't care who you are" 4 stars
12/13/06 jdean62 Does anyone want a used DVD for 1 cent SUCKED 1 stars
12/06/06 T I turned it off after 15 minutes. If I hadn't rented it, I would have broken the DVD. 1 stars
12/02/06 cd In the name of sanity I condem this film 4 GIT-R-Dun being so over used 1 stars
9/19/06 Joyster boring 1 stars
9/17/06 Ryan_A By, for and starring morons. I hope Larry (and his fans) get sucked into a jet engine. 1 stars
8/11/06 michael average and wait for the DVD 3 stars
8/10/06 Steve-O Why is he a fucking health inspector when he's Larry the CABLE GUY? Beyond fucking retarded 1 stars
8/09/06 John Bailey Best movie i ever did saw. 5 stars
8/01/06 Sugarfoot About as funny as a Knock Knock joke. 1 stars
5/24/06 The Velcro Warlock Should have shown more of where Jane gets the shits real bad. Amy way too surly too long. 4 stars
5/09/06 Susan Dugas We Found it to be very funny, some of you people need to lighten up! 5 stars
5/04/06 Duffyboy666 Total Shit 1 stars
4/27/06 The Satellite Guy He ain't even no real cable guy, what a fake ass mofo! 1 stars
4/16/06 Lalayla Johnson It was oI expected more from some1 who makes people laugh so hard they fart. 2 stars
4/13/06 Sean No. No. No. No. No. This is like having your bollocks butchered by a rusty blade 1 stars
4/08/06 aarie dreadful in every single way 1 stars
4/08/06 Frank Rountree I thought it was very funny, but then... I'm a REDNECK too. 3 stars
4/07/06 Ryden The sole reason why redneck humor is no good 1 stars
4/04/06 Bob Siesholtz I snuck in to see this movie, and I still felt like asking for my money back. 1 stars
4/01/06 geodude Manos for rednecks. Anyone who buys this should be bayonetted 1 stars
3/31/06 Soha Molina bad 1 stars
3/31/06 PrAvA Hollywood stop doing this! 1 stars
3/30/06 JM Synth I'd rather have my cable installed by the guy from "Shocker" than Larry(I havent seen this) 1 stars
3/29/06 Gworgie FUCK 1 stars
3/29/06 mike this redneck geek is not funny at all 1 stars
3/29/06 Westlake GIT-R-DUMB 1 stars
3/28/06 Sean D I am at a loss for words. 1 stars
3/28/06 Brian Meyer Razzie's got a new butt to kiss. This is just pathetic!!!!!! 1 stars
3/27/06 Dick Cheney Watch out Larry, I'm getting my shotgun and this time I will kill you. 1 stars
3/25/06 George W Bush This movie's almost as dumb as I am. 1 stars
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  24-Mar-2006 (PG-13)
  DVD: 08-Aug-2006



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