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Overall Rating

Awesome: 14.04%
Worth A Look: 14.04%
Average: 5.26%
Pretty Bad: 17.54%
Total Crap49.12%

3 reviews, 39 user ratings

First Knight
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by Roo

"I wish I had just re-rented EXCALIBUR...."
1 stars

FIRST KNIGHT tries really, really hard. I mean it. I'll give them credit for that much. Unfortunately it managed to suck more than almost any film I've watched this year....

Oh, my GOD, what a foul piece of work.

Step 1: fire the entire costuming department.

Step 2: get rid of the properties department.

Step 3: go hire the guys who did MERLIN, since that's obviously the kind of epic you were aiming for, but you missed, oh, GOD, how you missed....

The costumes look like reject ideas from the set of STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION's first season. The armor is made of tinfoil, as evidenced by a scene in which Lancelot drops his, and it crumples when it hits the ground. The props are from a wide range of time periods, definitely hammering home the idea that this movie is pure fantasy, and means to have no historical basis whatsoever, even though it uses real places like England as a setting.

Scripting was almost as bad. Let's take, oh, say, half the Arthur story, and toss the rest out. Do we want a Mordred? Nah, too complicated for today's audiences, let's come up with a new bad guy....let's call him, oh, I dunno, how about Malagant? Do you think that's too obvious? And let's make it clear just HOW bad the bad guys are, by having them fight with crossbows. Yeah, small, hand-held crossbows that fire solid-steel armor-piercing bolts and are accurate out to four hundred yards or so. Maybe we can get the props guys from YOR: HUNTER FROM THE FUTURE to put them together for us.

Bonuses: Sean Connery as King Arthur. Boy, I'd have paid good money to see a good Arthur movie made, with Sean Connery as the Once as Future King. As it was, I heckled my way through this one (something I NEVER do, but by GOD, I couldn't help myself). Richard Gere was even relatively believable as Lancelot, and Julia Ormond was excellent as Guinevere, but this movie lacked a few things, like style, substance, and direction.

Drag the director, the producers, the screewriters, and the entire costume and props departments out and shoot them. Maybe you could use one of those awful prop crossbows....

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originally posted: 11/09/99 08:05:51
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User Comments

2/27/14 Madame de Merteuil Connery is a great Arthur. Gere is awful. Plot is weak 2 stars
10/03/09 Erica It was a classic display of feudalistic times 4 stars
8/19/08 JM Synth Some slow spots, but a marvel to look at and generally entertaining 4 stars
7/12/08 John Millheim It was extremely boring,film had so much potential but fell short 1 stars
1/26/08 Pamela White Sean is excellent as king 4 stars
7/02/07 -marshall. a novel twist. misses Mark the on Key points. cant enjoy the cast?enjoy the cinematography 3 stars
7/20/06 David Cohen An even worse treatment of the legend than "King Arthur" 1 stars
3/06/06 Anthony Feor Sean Connery does it again 4 stars
8/13/05 ES Mr. Connery we need you to do what you do best= to sell out & make horrible ruinous movies 1 stars
6/08/04 John strange casting though cute as a children's fairy tale 3 stars
1/18/04 S. Barker The costumes are just idiotic, unrealistic, pathetic, 1 stars
10/13/03 Ma. Racquel Sedano that was a very nice movie, and i really like it and i hope there will be a part two 5 stars
6/10/03 Jack Bourbon Connery does well: "I can't believe this cunt rejected me for that longhair pussy. Eh." 1 stars
1/26/03 Kay Loved night scenes with standing stones and ancient Wales 4 stars
11/19/02 Sheila Wharram One of the best films I have seen in a long time - clean, and with a good story. 5 stars
11/14/02 Isaac Johnson This movie is a great example of a fantasy epic with a new flare, I love it! 5 stars
10/14/02 Charles Tatum What's Gere doing in this? "Yo, Guinevere" 1 stars
3/17/02 Zargo i love the stories of king arthur, how i could i not like this movie? 2 stars
1/23/02 Andrew Carden I Kept On Hoping That Sean Would Have A Stroke and Die. 1 stars
1/21/02 Kiminator Richard Gere is breathtaking and Sean Connery is remarkable. Superb acting! Great movie! 5 stars
9/23/01 Larry Smith Sean Connery one of Best Actors of the Century! Lancelot - a French character! No accent! 5 stars
9/04/01 Butterbean Nice performances. They should have hired an actor with a british accent for Gere's role. 4 stars
8/28/01 luana is really bad 1 stars
8/01/01 Terrie Smith Fairly good. Connery & Ormond are fine; could have left Gere at home. 4 stars
4/05/01 petey So afwul it is a delight to watch and heckle. The worst big budget movie ever made? 1 stars
1/12/01 Nannie Colon I think this movie is one of awesome movies I have never seen. 5 stars
12/28/00 Turtle An okay action/drama flick, but nothing really worthwhile. 4 stars
11/14/00 The EVIL Penguin more like a Disneyland castle 2 stars
6/24/00 Naushad Khanji Total nuts & irritating Connery.No competition for Excalibur. 1 stars
5/31/00 DREDD Great Movie, I prefered it of Excalibur, more realistic, loved the music... 5 stars
5/19/00 Creeper What a piece of crap! 1 stars
4/15/00 booty I paid good money for this flick and was not disappointed at ALL!! 5 stars
3/01/00 Mic What a load of crap - in the tradition of Gere movies (bar a couple). 1 stars
1/19/00 amanda Bullshit! MY GOD i wanted someone to blind me during this piece of voluminous shit!!!!! 1 stars
11/10/99 the Grinch Roo, you just became my personal hero. Dissed First Knight AND Merlin in one review! 2 stars
11/09/99 Wyatt Earp Good lord this was a bad bad foul film 1 stars
11/04/99 Karahde Khan The persons who wrote this really hated Arthurian legends. And Gere sucks, as usual. 1 stars
9/17/99 strike The cast is terrible in this offending piece of shit! 1 stars
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  07-Jul-1995 (PG-13)

  07-Jul-1995 (PG)


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