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Overall Rating
2.57

Awesome: 13.33%
Worth A Look: 13.33%
Average: 10%
Pretty Bad43.33%
Total Crap: 20%

4 reviews, 36 user ratings


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Perfect Murder, A
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by Derek

"A PUTRID MURDER."
2 stars

I was in A PERFECT MURDER. I got left on the cutting room floor (sniff). But that's not the reason that I think the movie blows. Besides, the meals were pretty good; you don't do extra work for the sake of your art.

If you happen to have read my review of BASIC INSTINCT, you know what I think of the whole Michael Douglas-in-peril genre of movies. In short, they suck. Except for THE GAME; that was good.

I'm not a part of the anti-Gwyneth camp. I think she's good, and that she can definitely act. However, it certainly is gross to see her married to Michael Douglas. Before the age of plastic surgery, such a yucky pairing would not have been possible. If we're supposed to like Gwyneth's character, it's best not to have her bring to mind Anna Nicole Smith. As I've said elsewhere, stay tuned for the remake of TO CATCH A THEIF starring Gregory Peck and Anna Paquin.

This one, as you may know, is a modern remake of DIAL M FOR MURDER. Apparently it is widely believed in Hollywood that it is not cost-effective to come up with an original plot for a thriller. Plus, there are so many glaring "hi, I'm a trite plot device in a thriller" moments in this movie that you start to think, "I already know what's going to happen. Isn't the movie supposed to fool ME?" And somewhere I heard someone say, when a killer in one of these movies finally attackes the hero or heroine, how come they don't just shoot them? No, they always take the old "let's wrestle and see what happens" approach. Plus, the whole audience has already seen that lingering close-up of the maid putting that meat thermometer in the dish strainer, right near the edge of the counter, so you know damn well where that thing is gonna end up.

Anyone who is fooled even for a second by this movie is either 1) eight years old or younger, 2) a Mormon at their first R-rated movie, or 3) a victim of amnesia or electroshock therapy.

link directly to this review at https://www.efilmcritic.com/review.php?movie=25&reviewer=71
originally posted: 02/27/99 09:49:34
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User Comments

11/12/08 PAUL SHORTT SIMPERS ALONG WITH RELATIVELY LITTLE SUSPENSE OR THRILLS 1 stars
1/15/07 Gloria Dornin Well, I will never trust what I think is true in relationship 5 stars
5/22/06 Jack Sommersby Stylish and suspenseful, with Douglas simply magnificent. 4 stars
5/28/05 Indrid Cold Well made, but just too cliche to be interesting. 3 stars
1/18/05 tatum Slick entertainment 4 stars
8/11/04 engel y. sarvida its incomparable! 4 stars
3/31/04 ray The reviewers who gave this bad marks are plainly jaded fools who can't spot clever dialog! 5 stars
1/27/04 Priscilla Postlethwaite Creepily effective with Gwyneth Paltrow better than usual 5 stars
9/29/03 Monster W. Kung "Let's do Hitchcock as a 3rd rate direct-to-video thriller!" Horrid, despicable crap. 1 stars
7/25/03 Shadaan Feleli Remake a Hitchcock Masterpiece ... WHAT ARE YOU CRAZY???? !!!!!! 2 stars
5/23/03 mr. Pink A pointless remake of Dial M for Murder. Everyone is at their worst in this dull movie 1 stars
4/19/03 Jin Lame with dull characters. 1 stars
4/15/03 Jack Bourbon Gwyneth's acting as bad as Viggo's painting. Scrub brush? Curious George method pilfered? 2 stars
1/01/03 KMG OF COURSE A GIRL WOULD LEAVE DOUGLAS' OLD KIWIS FOR VIGGO'S MANHOOD! 3 stars
1/01/03 Jack Sommersby A tense, stylish thriller. Douglas and Mortensen are outstanding! 4 stars
10/30/02 Patrick this has a good ending. 5 stars
10/12/02 Elizaveta Well...you could tell Douglas was nuts from the beginning. And what was with the Hebrew?! 3 stars
5/17/02 Priscilla Postelthwaite Creepily effective with Gwyneth Paltrow better than usual 5 stars
1/24/02 R.W. Welch Those who think they can improve on Hitchcock are living in a dream. 3 stars
8/10/01 E-Funk Thrilling remake of Hitchcock. Douglas is as evil as ever! 5 stars
8/05/01 Randy G Not good slow, sloppy and wasted characters. Mike D is showing his age. He will be much bet 2 stars
4/24/01 analucia all in all not a bad movie, good examples of different forms of deceit, not predictable 4 stars
2/11/01 Leather jacket Don't get any ideas...you're suppose to love your wife! 5 stars
6/26/00 stranded on the Island thoroughly enjoyable thriller, for Gwyneth P. fans a must--she is beautiful in this one! 5 stars
2/17/00 Bozo i loathe and despise the overrated paltrow and she is horrible in this as well 2 stars
2/06/00 Kyle Broflovski Deliver me from Gwyneth Paltrow's perpetual I'm-in-pain expression. 3 stars
1/04/00 Nice Guy Eddie Gwyneth was great; this flick was better than most thrillers being put out now. Bad ending. 4 stars
8/14/99 Marshy No more Hitchcock remakes! This bites. 2 stars
1/14/99 Em Heard Gwyn dumped Ben for Viggo Mortensen. Hope she wasn't attracted to his acting ability 1 stars
12/11/98 Brent Suprised to see all the bad reviews here - I rather enjoyed it. 4 stars
10/14/98 Chi-Fan Hu Stupid Plot and a stupid movie 2 stars
9/12/98 Bart Barton Douglas is too old for this part 1 stars
8/24/98 The Capital City Goofball I actually enjoyed this, though Douglas grated on my nerves. 4 stars
8/23/98 Mister Whoopee My popcorn was more interesting. 2 stars
8/16/98 Johny Fine enough to sit through 3 stars
8/13/98 {{OZ}} Bah. Gwyneth and Michael? Yeah right. Lame. 2 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  03-Jun-1998 (R)
  DVD: 08-Feb-2005

UK
  N/A

Australia
  15-Oct-1998 (M)




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