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Overall Rating

Awesome: 8.33%
Worth A Look: 0%
Average: 16.67%
Pretty Bad: 16.67%
Total Crap58.33%

1 review, 6 user ratings

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by Slyder

"Incredibly ridiculous"
1 stars

You know, whenever you’re watching a movie, it’s the filmmaker’s responsibility that the events, no matter if they’re based on reality or in fantasy, have to be truly credible so we can believe it and be involved with the movie. It seems they forgot that here. But hey, this is a Disney kid’s flick, what the hell did you expect? Um I don’t know, some good laughs, maybe?

Kid (Brian Bonsall) riding a bike gets rolled over by some gangster fuck (Miguel Ferrer), gangster fuck gives him ultimately a half-written check (no amount but a 1 written in), and the boy walks away from it all, signing off on a million bucks. Enter cue cards: Hilarity, wacky, zany, antics; jack-asses.

Yeah right, if only it were half as believable as it shows. I’m actually dying to ask Miguel Ferrer a simple question: what the fuck were you thinking when you signed for this? Gee, now that's what I call a waste of talent. Tone-Loc is also here, and that even makes me wonder aloud why? Maybe to throw in the usual "biieetch" remark from time to time? I couldn't imagine for anything else. Gee, and you think Disney cares about kids.

Throw in the usual clichés of the nerdy kid who’s been screwed over by his family and brothers, his ability to run a Mac computer, and then standing tall with a shit-load of money and buying a huge-ass mansion (without his parents EVER noticing) plus the utter idiocy of that gangster fuck and the amazing coincidence of the million dollars he was supposed to launder and you get yourself a typical wannabe comedy crap-fest. Oh, did I mention the whole Home Alone-like ending? Oh please, take me home, will you?

Kids will watch it and think it’s the biggest and funniest thing since Mr. Potato-head. Adults will cringe and sigh over this pile of shit and later wonder why their kids end up bombing their final exams. Oh, do I see a connection?

Anyways, parents, take your kids to see the classic Disney animated films and cartoons, and avoid watching their live-action horseshit like this stinker, otherwise you’ll end up being dumber than your average 5 year old. 0-5

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originally posted: 10/31/04 09:34:54
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User Comments

10/15/06 JM Synth Good for a live-action Disney movie, and not as irritating as the Home Alone films 3 stars
3/16/04 mr mister i wish the gangsters had put his head in a vice and squeezed it hard! fuck em! 2 stars
3/16/02 Frances well if u say so 2 stars
1/27/02 Andrew Carden Not A Very Good Movie, but It's Plot Holds It Together. 3 stars
6/26/01 WOW! Shittiest movie ever! 1 stars
11/19/00 martikn yeah 5 stars
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  11-Feb-1994 (PG)



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