American Werewolf in Paris, An

Reviewed By Chris Parry
Posted 09/01/98 22:46:44

"Complete and utter toilet. Rabid dog chases jocks. What crap."
1 stars (Total Crap)

Okay, so who wants to watch yet another awful sequel that borrows precious little from the original other than a passing reference in the title, designed to get you, Joe Consumer, to buy a ticket for you and your date under false pretences?

You, sir?
You, madame?

Okay, come this way and take a look at An American Werewolf In Paris.

What a steaming pile of diseased otter carcasses this film is.

You have Julie Delpy, a great French actress, playing one of the most depthless characters she's ever had the misfortune to be swindled into playing.

You have Tom Everett Scott, one of the least talented actors in America, nay the world, today.

You have a bunch of jocks who would have been passed over during the casting of Porky's 7 due to them looking like the most stereotypical jocks that have ever been portrayed. You half expect them to break out the partykeg, go for a panty-raid and call each other "dude".

And then there's the story. This script was surely written in French and then poorly translated because it was missing something.. something.. intelligence perhaps? A point? Feasibility? A semblance of reality? Humor? Gratuitous sex?

Well, at least it had special effects.

My ass it did.

Picture this. A woman jumps off the Eiffel Tower. Our jocks just happen to be getting ready to bungee jump off the tower at the same time, so one of the jocks jumps over, grabs the falling woman, places her on the ground and springs back up - smacking his head on a steel girder. So the woman is saved and our hero get's a little booboo on his head.

Treat me like an idiot and I'll fight back in kind. The producers, writers, directors and cast of this film *ARE IDIOTS*.

They wouldn't know a decent film if it jumped up, smacked them on the ass and ran around the room naked shouting "I'M A DECENT FILM! WOOOOOOO! DECENT FILM OVER HERE!".

The story goes nowhere, the cast are terrible, even Delpy, the FX are laughable, there's not a funny line in the entire flick.

Put simply, this film is a crock of shit and deserves your utter disrespect. They have blemished the memory of one of the best movies of the last twenty years and for that reason everyone involved should be hung by the spleen.

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