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Overall Rating

Awesome: 11.48%
Worth A Look: 18.03%
Average: 5.74%
Pretty Bad: 18.85%
Total Crap45.9%

10 reviews, 62 user ratings

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3,000 Miles to Graceland
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by Brian McKay

"The most reviled film I've ever liked"
4 stars

One thing I just don't get is all the haters that flock under the banner of "3000 Miles to Graceland Sucks!". My God, people, surely we've all seen films abysmally worse than this one. I'll give you that it's a pointless, overblown, soulless mess. But dammit, 3000 MILES TO GRACELAND (to be referred to hereafter as 3KMTG) simply rocks.

I'm not just defending 3KMTG as a guilty pleasure, but as a quality piece of filmmaking. With its Vegas scenery and desert vistas, it captures the essence of Detroit steel cruising the blue highways of lost Americana. Russell and Costner deliver up some of the most amusing portrayals of their careers as casino-robbing Elvis impersonators (and how many times has Russell played Elvis now, anyway?). Okay, so only Russell looks anything like The King. Costner sure as hell doesn't with that scraggly thin mop and muttonchop sideburns. Hey Kev, ever thought about Propecia?

The plot, such as it is, is that a group of robbers led by Michael Zane (Russell) and Thomas J. Murphy (Costner) decide to rob a Vegas casino in the midst of an Elvis impersonators convention. They think this is a foolproof plan because they'll blend right in (not realizing, apparently, that the Elvises toting assault rifles kinda stick out from all the others). Naturally, the plan gets completely botched up, and they end up making a narrow escape after shooting up about a dozen security guards and a hundred slot machines.

After that it's one big chase across the desert. Costner tries to screw everyone out of their share by taking the direct approach - killing them. Russell gets away, then goes after him and the money. He gets it back, but the plot (such as it is) thickens when his new white trash girlfriend (Courtney Cox) and her annoying klepto son are captured by Murphy. Meanwhile, Zane and Murphy are being chased all over hell's half acre by the requisite gaggle of cops, federal agents, and Casino gangsters who all want the money back. Oh, and don't let me forget to mention the most laughable subplot of all, where Murphy's fixation on The King is explained as a result of him being convinced that he is actually a Presley love child.

Yes, it's all rather silly, but oh so exuberant. It is both an indictment and a celebration of shallow, noisy, bright and glitzy filmmaking, with the choice of the Elvis Motif clearly symbolic of America's new, dead gods. Plus it's got Ice-T hanging upside down and shooting a bunch of dudes like some bizarre hip-hop ninja pinwheel of Uzi death, and Courtney Cox's glorious portrayal of a trailer park queen with an ass so tight you could bounce Susan B. Anthony's off of it and whose life could easily be the subject of a book entitled "Ten Really Stupid and Reprehensibly Bad Choices Women Make About Men"

3KMTG is like smoking a bowl and then dropping acid at a Las Vegas drive-in while shoveling obscene amounts golden gloop-covered popcorn and supersweet mega-fizzy cola into your yob. It's all about excess, baby - the bigger and dumber and louder, the better. If you can't find something to like about this film (shakes head disapprovingly), you're just not an American!

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originally posted: 03/02/03 10:10:44
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User Comments

2/14/18 Jack How the heck did this THING get made? It's beyond awful. 1 stars
9/13/17 morris campbell IT SUCKS 1 stars
3/23/16 David H. 3,000 miles to pure rubbish 1 stars
6/22/14 Richard Brandt Has Courtney Cox ever looked hotter? I don't think so! 3 stars
6/04/11 Andrew L I was throughly entertained! gotta love courtneys assets 5 stars
2/27/10 Jeff Wilder Better than its reputation. 4 stars
8/30/08 Shaun Wallner This is the kind of movie you fall asleep too. 1 stars
7/20/08 travis this movie is so underrated, its not great, but its solid entertainment 4 stars
6/20/07 --- Not even worth renting. Turned it off after about 35 minutes....a total mess 1 stars
4/12/06 Seanboy Big, dumb but one of the most surreal things i've witnessed, EricD hit the nail on the head 4 stars
8/30/05 ES good action, good cast, no need to rip on a movie played for fun 4 stars
6/21/05 Indrid Cold It doesn't suffer from bad acting, but just about everything else. 2 stars
6/09/05 Agent Sands Though it can be good, light fun, it's also extremely corny and dumb at times too. 3 stars
2/11/05 Jeff Anderson AN ACTING MILESTONE FOR KEVIN COSTNER, I'M NOT KIDDING! He's one mean & despicable SOB!!!!! 5 stars
2/05/05 tatum Completely formula, but done with style. Costner is fantastic 5 stars
2/02/05 G-Man excellent plot and awesome acting 5 stars
10/18/04 adam shaw (ivan campo) incredible, russell at his sizzling best!! 5 stars
9/13/04 Anarchist_101 This film is 'VERY' underrated... Hey, it's better than a Van Dame flick! 5 stars
6/26/04 Travado de Skol This is the one of the greatest films i have seen, the firt is gladiator and this came afte 5 stars
5/14/04 AngeFaitore Thomas Haden Church was hot, though. 2 stars
5/05/04 J.Peckerfoot Shame bout costner.its not a BAD film,its just not that great either.Watchable tho. 3 stars
1/16/04 Samuel a pretty decent film all in all 3 stars
1/04/04 moviebuff One plus: It's better than Horse Whisperer 1 stars
11/19/03 Jenny gicldod Courtney cox is Mean Petty Dumb 1 stars
6/26/03 cochese It was SUPPOSED to be cheesy. 4 stars
5/05/03 Jenny Tullwartz A Jailhouse Crock that Elvis would consider His Latest Shame if he had to see it. 2 stars
4/24/03 Andrew Carden Who Wrote This Film? A Donkey? Contrived and Mindless. 1 stars
3/23/03 GMan Will someone kill Costner please? Save me from this shit of a movie. 1 stars
3/11/03 Daniel T. Why do YOU write for this site? Looking for logic in the best US trash?Fuck Pulp Fiction! 5 stars
1/20/03 Jim Eh. Violent and shallow. Gets an extra star for tarting up Courteney Cox though. 3 stars
1/10/03 Ange Faitore The movie sucks but Thomas Haden Church looks hotter than ever and his acting is sharp! 2 stars
12/29/02 y2mckay Holy shit! Sommersby and I agree again! GUILTY PLEASURE - though more pleasure than guilt. 4 stars
12/29/02 Jon "Thumb the Toad" Lyrik Wait a second. Sommersby thinks this tripe is better than Memento? BAH! 1 stars
10/27/02 MarktheShark6 "Nobody ever says: 'the King is Down.'" This movie was great, wow... 5 stars
5/18/02 Candace Troy Powers Jenny, Don't Be Cruel, Hard Hearted Woman! Nothin' to get All Shook Up about! 3 stars
5/18/02 Jenny Tullwartz A Jailhouse Crock that Elvis would consider His Latest Shame if he had to see it. 2 stars
3/20/02 Aborted Gently This film was a guilty pleasure for me. It was so hokey and predictable, but fun to watch. 4 stars
11/01/01 jamie ward a must see this is the best movie of the year Kevin Costner 4 life 5 stars
9/29/01 Phoenix Has some elements of a good movie, but ends up being mediocre. 3 stars
8/14/01 SJKelley What movie were you watching? This was a very good film from beginning to end. 5 stars
8/09/01 Monday Morning I hate Kevin Costner's guts. He can't act and is probably a flaming asshole in real life. 1 stars
7/15/01 Rampage Goddam ugly movie... Russell's shoddiest of his career 1 stars
5/24/01 viking I won't waste my money on this crap 1 stars
5/23/01 Archibld Does this thing ever end???? 1 stars
4/26/01 Brian Elvis impersonators + machine guns + trashy women - socially redeeming value = GOOD TIMES! 4 stars
3/25/01 Sid 6.7 A guaranteed, insultingly lobotomized candidate for the 2001 recycling bin of clunkers 1 stars
3/20/01 val WHY ME GOD!?!?! WHY!!!!!!!!!!! 1 stars
3/09/01 Dave I should have gotten a fiber optic video scope and watched the inside of my butt for 2 hrs 1 stars
3/08/01 Joseph F. Thompson I thought it was a great film 5 stars
3/07/01 Mike If I were to die without going to confession I would gostraight to hell with the producers! 1 stars
3/02/01 greg morfoot awesome film 5 stars
3/02/01 Captain Highcrime Not enough Paul Anka if you ask me. 1 stars
3/02/01 Weasel Could've been good if they changed the actors, script, and director 1 stars
2/28/01 The Evil Penguin I Liked It. Pretty much. 4 stars
2/28/01 AK47 I SAID this movie would suck and TAJ yelled at me! 1 stars
2/27/01 Jeff Unique characters, love Lovitz, and Courteney Cox is worth watching alone 5 stars
2/27/01 The Bomb 69 ??????????????????????????????????????? 1 stars
2/25/01 *~Danielle*Ophelia~* (formerly KyLe*BrOfLoVsKi) 42 muscles to frown, 4 to extend your arm and smack all involved upside the head. 1 stars
2/24/01 Greyhound So it ain't Mission Impossible. Still fun, and Courteney Cox is HOT!! Needed more cast time 4 stars
2/24/01 Kairi Taylor A movie with Costner AND Russell in it....RUN MUTHAFUCKER RUN LIKE A BITCH IN HEAT!!!! 1 stars
2/24/01 Kiss My Grits WHY GOD WHY? 1 stars
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  23-Feb-2001 (R)



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