Barb Wire

Reviewed By Ryan Arthur
Posted 08/29/98 01:31:21

"Stick to the homemade porn, Pammy."
1 stars (Total Crap)


Pop quiz, kids.
I can only recommend this film if you're a fan of:

a.) bad acting
b.) really bad acting
c.) monumentally bad acting

Yep. C.

This movie bites it. Hard. Pamela Anderson Lee Luc-Picard strutting around in black leather and 6 inch heels with big-ass guns. It's really a movie only a 13-year-old boy could love, and he could probably only love it if his parents weren't in the house, and even then he'd be disappointed.

Oh sure, he'd get to see the occasional flash of a silicone enhanced teat, but even that wouldn't be enough to get him to sit through the whole thing.

Pam can't act. Plain and simple, and far from new information. You'll get better acting (and more T & A) from a porn flick. I'm completely serious. She's completely wooden, showing no emotion as she tries to come off like some bad girl. She's more of a bad acting girl. Temeurah Morrison, so good in Once Were Warriors (now that's a movie) is just waiting to get his paycheck so he can get the hell out of there. Jack Noseworthy, once again, is dreadful. It's a wonder how he gets jobs anymore.

The plot's dumb, the characters are lame, and - I'll say it again - take away Pam's hoo-hahs and the woman is completely talentless.

Did I mention it's terrible?

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